What a 245 page manuscript looks like

The view from my desk:

The view at my feet:

Tough Enough To Wear Pink:

Our recent visitor:

Suitable breakfast attire for the Stampede:

Interview: The Writing Mother

No, I'm not interviewing myself... but Kelly Robbins of the Copywriting Institute interviewed me a while back and my interview is now up!

Find out how I cope with writing at home with my kids, and how I broke into my niche market!

IN WHICH I HAVE SOME CHEESE WITH MY WHINE

Oh I'm a little cranky today. It was one of THOSE days where nothing gets done. Where every time I ventured within a foot of my computer I would be pulled away by one of the kids.

My son is pretty easy to appease. He can pretty much be pointed in a direction and he'll run with it. My daughter, 10.5 months, not so much. Her favorite thing to do as soon as I sit at the computer is to crawl over and head for the cables beneath the desk I really wish I was organized enough to have my cables all neat and tidy and tucked. But I'm not.

I try to block her with my legs, but I can't really move since I'm usually worried about moving my chair and rolling it over a finger.

That lasts all of a minute before she objects and I pick her up and go play. Apparently she doesn't yet understand "Mommy has to transcribe three long interviews, honey!"

So why am I sitting here blogging...?

Just us chickens

I think that the midnight hour is a time seen by many writers. Especially the Writing Mothers. It's the quiet, still time of night when everyone is asleep and you are either just finishing up for the day, or just getting wound up.

Back when I worked full time and wrote "the rest of the time" I would rarely go to bed before midnight. It was just the way it was. My son was in bed, asleep by 8 pm and I would be sitting at the computer with the TV providing some background noise (and distraction).

These days I don't often see midnight as much as I used to. I get more done during the day. Normally. Today was not a normal day.

I had a photo shoot for my book, which was a blast. My model is one of the top professional horse trainers in Canada. In fact she is THE top rider. And she's gorgeous. And a sweetheart. You can't even hate her.

I battled traffic and road closures and was (unfortunately) late for our shoot, but we got it all done.

Earlier in the day a family friend had called. She's an accountant and had offered to help walk me through the hell that is QuickBooks. (Oh sure, you all SAY it's easy but you overestimate my mathability) She called and said "So, we're on for tonight, right?"

She'd forgotten to call and ask if Tuesday was ok for me. I made it ok. We walked through the process and I learned a great deal about what I can and can't do in the program. I have some data entry to get done... but other than that... I think I'll be ok.

The issues stem from the fact that there are many ways I receive money from publications. One, I send in an invoice when I submit my story and I'm paid on publication. Another is paid on acceptance. Another pays in US dollars and another pays in US dollars but on published word count only.. if they use it.

It's all straight in my head, really.

I started a new book yesterday. Jodi Picoult's Perfect Match. Boy, this is one emotionally draining book. But it's SO good. I'm not reading any more tonight as it's time for me to hit the sack, but you can bet it will be calling me in the morning!

Catching up on Blogs

Over the last couple of weeks I've woefully neglected my blogging buddies. I haven't commented, I haven't even read. How rude.

So I'm reading this morning. Here's the down low on my blogosphere:

Vicki at Standing Up For Your Child has a great post on modeling good advocate behaviour for your child. Her book Standing Up For Your Child is coming out in July and the first chapter is here.

Love has made Mir and Otto land barons.

Whitney Gaskell's new book Mommy Tracked is coming out on August 28th and you can find an excerpt here.

The Literary Chicks are signing off. Which kind of makes me grumpy, mostly because I feel like I neglected reading them and now they are gone.

Jenn has gone underground. Me thinks a) hubby found her blog or b) she is blogging somewhere else without telling me. I vote for c) both a and b.

Ann Douglas has an end of June grab bag post up. And she attended a 200th Birthday Party.

Tess Gerritsen talks about print runs and their effect on marketing your book.

Groups, Associations, Unions

It's been a few days, I know. I watch my site stats and think "I'm sorry I had nothing here for you when you stopped by!! Ack! It's like asking someone to come over and then saying - sorry, it's a bad time, I have no coffee on."

I turned 30 last weekend. I don't think I really get it yet. I'm 30! Woot!

Yeah... it's no different from the weekend before. Same book, different pile. (See, only writers will get that reference.)

I'm wondering these days about online writer's groups and associations. I'm a member of many groups and two associations. I'm considering letting my association memberships lapse because if I'm being honest, I don't really get a lot out of them that my groups don't provide.

What often happens is you end up surrounded by people who have paid a membership and expect things. And they complain when things don't come to them. Such is the nature of a membership-based organization. 10% of the people will be in full complaining mode, 10% will be actively running the association and on the board and 80% are apathetic but being tugged on by the two smaller segments.

It's tiring to be in associations, and I'm an extrovert. I've also been in all three groups above. If I'm a complainer, my feedback is "then do something about it and volunteer". If I volunteer the feedback is "you are trying to tell me how to do my job" or "you aren't doing enough". If I am in the apathetic group I'm told "you aren't qualified to complain because you don't volunteer" or "you've got your head in the sand and you need to see that the board is screwing up".

Tiring I tell ya!

Recently I thought about joining another association, a union. It's a fledgling one, about 350 to 400 members. I joined their listserv and listened in for a while to see if I could get an idea of what their flavor was.

Sour grapes with a touch of bitterness. That was their flavor.

As with almost every union I've ever come into contact with, it was "us against them and them" meaning the union against "the man" as well as "any non-union worker". Except I'm a non-union worker and I didn't like how I was being categorized. So no, I didn't send my dues in and I didn't join. They may have a future, they may not. But I don't really want to be associated with them at this time.

There is one group that I'll gladly pay my membership fee to again next year, Freelance Success. This isn't a group for newbies and I don't think they suffer fools, so you should have your books in a pile before you join. But you can get a free week's access if you go over to their site.

Currently I'm doing a Query Challenge and I'm enjoying it. The beginning of the week was a big hectic. Kindergarten ended, I had a trip to the ER to recover from... but I'm up to five queries. And I have to tell you, that's more than I've done in the last three months.

I got one tentative acceptance to a new market already!

The Last Day of Kindergarten

Oh my eyes shall not remain dry today. Today my son has his last day at Kindergarten. How did this happen. How did I have a baby boy and blink and have a child who will soon be really and truly "school aged". I've tried to keep him a child, my child, my boy. I refer to him as the Kindergartener, unwilling to think that he's really "in school".

And he is still so small. I watch him walk and he's all knobby knees and elbows. All toothy grin and dirt around his mouth. All full of life and ready to do battle at the drop of a hat with my ruler as a sword and stick for his opponent.

Yesterday his school work came home. I cried sitting at my desk and looking through his writing. I laughed at the answers. What do I like best about kindergarten? "I like to play with the sticks." What I didn't like about kindergarten. "I don't like to do work."

He grew 4 cm and 1 kg. (1.6 in and 2.2 lbs) and he gained a whole new vocabularly and skill set. I've learned a lot from his teachers. I have always spoken to my son like he's a small adult, but sometimes I still don't give him the credit that he will understand what I'm saying. Oh he does.

I was explaining that he had new cousins once I married Major Man. He said "What do you mean?" I said "Oh, cousins are ..." he interrupted, to say "I didn't ask what a cousin is, mom, I know that..." He was just wanting to know how he got them and who they were.

Can you tell a difference between the first day and the last?

Day One

Last Day

Why Write Nonfiction Instead of Fiction?

by Terry Whalin

Question:
Everyone says it is easier for an unpublished writer to break in with nonfiction vs. fiction? Is it only easier to break in with nonfiction if you have speaking engagements that will result in sales? I've always thought, "Who would buy my nonfiction? I'm a nobody without a degree, without a famous husband or friends and without an enthralling life." But everyone says it's easier to break in with nonfiction so I thought they meant that even if I'm a nobody, if I can speak to a "felt need" I can sell books.

Answer:
Here's the story about nonfiction--you don't have to have a degree or anything to write nonfiction--you do have to be able to write. And with a nonfiction book proposal--shaped in the expected format with the expected elements (something I'm teaching two extensive workshops on this year--in Florida and North Carolina), then you can break into the traditional book market--with the right idea.

With fiction, you need to be great (many aren't--just look at all the stuff in my office I need to reject this coming week if you want a visual), and it has to be a complete manuscript (so I know that you know how to end it--unless you have published a number of fiction novels). I've been writing an ebook that I plan to launch soon which will have the inside scoop about nonfiction book proposals. I've about got the cover designed and everything in place--called: Book Proposals That Sell--21 Secrets To Speed Your Success.

If you want to read a fascinating writing book, get a copy of (excuse the title--it's the real title:) Damn! Why didn't I write that? subtitled: How ordinary people are raking in $100,000.00 ...or more Writing Nonfiction Books & How You can Too! by Marc McCutcheon (Quill Driver Books) 2001.

I didn't get the zeros wrong on the subtitle--it's 100K (a hundred thousand). The book is simple reading and fascinating. Maybe it will be a huge boost to your confidence level.

Look at devotional books--nonfiction--and no degree or experience necessary other than a heart after God--and I wrote two of them which sold over 60,000 copies EACH. I wrote these books as a work made for hire--but I think I made $5,000 on each book and wrote each manuscript in a two-week period. That's $10,000 in one month that I made on those projects which is plenty from my vantage point. They are beautiful devotional books--no longer in print--Lighthouse Psalms and Love Psalms. It's not rocket science and you could do it too.

Another area to consider as a writer is collaborative nonfiction. It's where you are the writer (credentialed or not--if you can write is all that matters) and you hook up with a personality or expert to sell the book. Your co-author does all of the book promotion and has the story content for the book. You do the writing, get paid and go on to the next book. A number of writers make a substantial living every year from writing these types of books. It isn't required that they have a degree or a particular background--just the proof that you can write in a particular situation. It's all that is going to count for the publisher.

I encourage every writer who wants to have a book published to learn how to write a nonfiction book proposal then begin marketing that proposal to publishers or agents and get a nonfiction book contract. Then write the book.

__________________________________________________
W. Terry Whalin understands both sides of the editorial desk--as an editor and a writer. He worked as an editor for Decision and In Other Words. His magazine articles have appeared in more than 50 publications including Writer's Digest and Christianity Today. Terry has written more than 55 nonfiction books and his latest is The Complete Idiot's Guide to Teaching the Bible (Alpha Books). See more about Terry at:www.right-writing.com/whalin.html. For more than 12 years Terry has been an ECPA Gold Medallion judge in the fiction category. He has written extensively about Christian fiction and reviewed numerous fiction books in publications such as CBA Marketplace and BookPage. He is the Fiction Acquisitions Editor for Howard Publishing and creator of www.right-writing.com. Sign up for Terry's free newsletter, Right Writing News.
© 2004 W. Terry Whalin


**This post brought to you by my major deadlines!

Those Mac/PC Commercials

You know those Mac vs PC commercials that are on TV? (Where else would commercials be, really?)

I love 'em. But not because I love Macs. In fact, it's the PC guy that is endearing. The Mac guy is a smug little so-and-so and I don't like how me makes fun of the poor PC guy. The PC guy tries so hard and is so earnest.

That's why I love my PC. It's earnest. It doesn't think it's better than anyone else, it just focuses on the task and gets the job done without trying to be cool. I hate the trying to be cool.

This post brought to you by the art of procrastinating from the final editing of the book.

The Whys.

If you are a part of my Writing Mother Yahoo Group, then you may have already heard... I'm officially, officially a full time freelancer. But weren't you already? Yes and no. Yes, I freelanced full time. But I had this wonderful thing called Maternity Leave Benefits going on.

And at the end of this month, the benefits run out. So it was time to let my boss know that I wasn't coming back.

So I did.

Then he offered me a raise AND a promotion.

While I told him that I'd think about it... there really isn't anything to think about. I will still be mentally and financially better off staying at home. Truthfully, I might be a bit financially ahead if I went back, but is a couple thousand dollars a year worth the sacrifice mentally?

Today I helped my daughter stand on her own. She's ten months and can only do it for a few seconds before she's over come with giggles and she either starts to topple or she flops down on her butt.

I was here when the neighbor kid came over for the first time to ask if my son could come out to play. My son's face lit up because he's been quite leery of the boys in the neighborhood and now it seems they are buddies.

I was here to stack blocks with my daughter and giggle with my son as she smashed the blocks down with a mighty baby roar.

When my son splashed water all over the bathroom, I had enough energy left to accept it calmly and deal with it rather than get frustrated because it was another job to do before I could go write for the day. I'd been writing all day, I wasn't pressed for time.

I was worried about giving up my RRSPs and DPSP (deferred profit sharing plan) until I realized that I don't have to share my profits with anyone. And yesterday I signed up for a new RRSP with a really hot financial consultant... who happens to be my husband.

A fellow writer cautioned me about leaping into the freelance pool too soon. I understood her concerns, she'd tried to do it before. I did too... as a single mother with hardly any writing credits to my name. I wasn't in a good place emotionally as I'd just come out the "sunny" side (supposedly) of a divorce. I was too stressed to be a good writer or a good mother. Now I have five years experience with both.

And some savings... that's important. I've known this day was coming for over a year... ever since I got pregnant with my daughter I knew that I'd stay home when it was time. And I know WHY I'm staying home, deep in my heart and soul.

You are amazing.

I came across this article in one of the newsletters I receive. I almost missed it because I had convinced myself that I'm too busy this week to be reading anything. But I'm glad I did.

I heard it first at Starbucks. I ordered "calm" tea (needed it). When the barista, a cute, funky little thing, dropped in the teabag, she forgot to secure the string.

The tail landed ploink in the hot water. "I'm a little brain-dead today," she said. "But don't worry, I'm amazing." She smiled mischievously (not unlike my 2-year-old son). "A little conceited," she added, "but amazing."

Read more....

I AM FREAKING OUT

Deadline approaching, deadline approaching....

ACK!

Not just a regular deadline either... ACK!

Book Deadline!

Six weeks out!

Must get photographs organized!

I think the biggest surprise of this entire project has been the incredible amount of work that it takes to organize all the photos, line drawings and graphics.

And here you thought publishing a book was about WRITING!

Wha? It's Thursday already?

Holy Camoley, it's Thursday already!

June is a crazy month for me. It's my birthay month and I'm turning A Decade Year this time around. Hubby has been planning my birthday party and I'm really trying not to interfere. I can hardly restrain myself. I know it's a little rude to try hone in on someone else's plans, but I am a control freak...

I know that I shouldn't complain. It only took a few hints for him to get that I wanted him to plan my birthday party. I'm still scarred from my 18th birthday party... when no one showed up. Yep, me and my mom, drinking alone. Fun!

Oh I'll just say it. I'm turning 30. About half of you just thought "is that all?"

There's something about the 30 birthday. There are so many things that I said I'd be doing by the time I was 30. Truthfully, I've done quite a few of the things ... but there are those crazy ones: learn to fly a plane, travel around the world, get my scuba license... that I just never got around to doing.

But now that it's almost the summer solstice, I start thinking about how fast time is flying. By the 22nd of June the days will actually be getting shorter, not longer... and here in Calgary the summer has only just begun.

I went to the doctor today. She was investigating a suspicious lump. She doesn't think that it's anything to worry about, but suggests that I make an appointment for a couple weeks from now to poke and prod me again. It just got me thinking about when we realize that our lives are actually getting shorter and not stretching out before us into eternity.

Making, Not Finding Time to Write

I found a great article for all you Writing Mothers out there.

Time is on Our Side: Write to the Beat of Your Circadian Rhythms

How do you find time to write?

That's a question I'm often asked, not because I'm the most productive
writer in the world.

I am not.

But the question misses the mark. It's not about finding time to write, but making it. For inspiration, here are some ways that busy people make time to pursue writing dreams that may lie outside their day jobs or family lives.

Read on...

All moved!

Sorry for the delay in posting my friendly internets, I was moving! It was a little stressful and not nearly as organized as our last move. I throw my hands up because I had no part in this move. Yes I had a temper tantrum and told the family that THEY could plan the dern thing if they didn't want to listen to me. I feel vindicated. Disorganized and chaotic, but vindicated. "Ha, I won that argument!" she said from behind the pile of boxes.

How disorganized am I? Check out my new office:

It doubles as the play area for the kids. And apparently a storage spot for my saddle over there in the corner!

One thing that's great about this place is that the main floor is all one floor. There are no stairs at the entry way and I can close the door to downstairs. My daughter isn't ready to climb up the stairs yet, but when she is, a baby gate will work nicely. But for now, she can do her crawl/scoot thing all over the office, dining room and kitchen.

Off to the left side of the picture are the sliding doors to outside. There's a small yard that barely contains all the outside toys.

I got quite overwhelmed in the last week with moving and family stresses. I have been waking up in the middle of the night with my jaw clenched. It doesn't help that my daughter has been waking up 3-4 times a night either. What's up with that?! I considered going for a nap this morning while she did, but I really don't want to fall further behind in my writing.

So, without further delay... I'm off to write. Er, check email... er... have more coffee.

A Third!

I got an idea for a third book proposal! Yippeee!

I used to be one of those writers who wondered how other writers got so many ideas. I mean really, where did they come from? Out of thin air? How can one incident spur on an entire novel?

My first book (the one that is sold and being written) came from a conversation with a friend about our favourite books and we realized that there was a hole. I decided to fill it.

The second idea came up in a conversation with my agent.

The third came today whiel I was bouncing my daughter on my knee and singing a song. One line struck me and I thought "gee, that would look good on a shirt." Driving later in the day I realized that you could write a whole book on the topic.

Or *I* could write a whole book on the topic! YAY for ideas!

Cultivating ideas takes work, just like cultivating a garden. I keep a running list of every single idea that pops into my head. I have a notepad right beside me and when an idea comes, I write it down. By doing this I've begun to take note of how good ideas sound, what elements they need, how I could tweak an idea and when to just let one go.

Sometimes it's the ones you let go that come back later, stronger and smarter. They just need to stew a little on the back burner.

Howzit going?

Day two of following the "Discipline Without Distress" thingy... and things are going well. Bed time was a little long, but it always is.

"I just need to come out to find Wolverine."

"I just need to come out to find a guy to fight Wolverine."

"I just need to come out to find water cause I'm thirsty cause I'm fighting with Wolverine."

I cannot wait until we move next week. No more having to put the Kindergartener to bed in MY room so he won't wake the baby in the crib. Woohoo!

Otherwise, I'm feeling very happy, hopeful and optimistic today! Usually when this happens I try to figure out WHY I'm feeling so happy, hopeful and optimistic. I want to REPLICATE it. But I am way, way too introspective and somedays you just need to ENJOY the feelings!

There's a "waiting for the other shoe to drop" feeling that you get when good things are happening. Like, "wait, I'm happy. What's going to go WRONG?"

The problem with this is that when you're a hammer, everything looks like a nail. So any little mis-step in the day looks like it's that BIG WRONG SHOE headed for you.

A Couple of Resources For Writers

If you are a copywriter, head over here to find free podcasts to download from some of the best copywriters in the world. My favourite is Bob Bly.

Erik Sherman has compiled a list of quotes for writers.

***

Now hubby and I have an arguement going on. He points out Canadianisms all the time and I had no idea that this was one of them.

Me: I like those houses.

Him: Which houses?

Me: Those ones. (pointing) Those ones right there.

Him: Those ONES? How can you have a bunch of ONE THINGS. It's like saying those bunch of single houses over there. Those ONES.

Me: And?

What say you oh wise internets? Have you ever said Those Ones?

Wassup ...

Mir got hitched.

Kira's kids are growing... waaah!

Joshilyn's dog committed planticide.

Lani has another podcast up ... and has invented the perfect mix of alcohol and writing

Lena's house still hasn't sold, and her breakdown is entertaining. For me. Not so much for her.

Til Debt Do Us Part

There's a show I watch some days called Til Debt Do Us Part. It's one of my indulgences in the middle of the day.

Money is the number one cause of failed marriages. Rare is the couple that agrees on how the pot should be divided and the bills paid. Most families are in debt, and with debt come family arguments, tears, tantrums and marriages on the verge of divorce. To save families from the doldrums of debt, each episode of Til Debt Do Us Part follows financial wizard Gail Vaz-Oxlade as she helps families go from red to black by getting to the root of their destructive spending habits. Related Reading on Slice.ca: Short of cash and it's still a week till payday? Read the slice.ca article, Survive on Little to No Money.

What this show helps me to do is to keep my family's financial situation in the forefront of my mind. My habit has been to exert control over my money by spending it. In a backwards sort of way I felt that it was the only way to show Money who was boss.

Thankfully I have a wonderful financial consultant to help me these days and the only debt we carry is my truck loan.

One habit I'd like to change is one I carried over from my own family's inability to save properly: telling my kids we can't buy something because we have no money.

While it's important to teach your kids to budget, it's equally important to keep the adult finances a topic of adult discussion only. Sure, you could break down the finances for your children, show them how much goes to rent and how much goes to food etc... but let's not scare the children!

I think that parents have a tendency to add extra information after the word "no" because they want their children to understand that they aren't just being mean, there are reasons for "no".

"No, we don't have enough money" actually causes kids to worry. If they don't have enough money... what does that mean? They already know that we use money to 'get things' like food and fuel and housing. There's a fine line between giving enough info and too much info.

Sometimes, though, no is enough.

Break My Heart

A few weeks ago while watching a Christian program I heard the phrase "Break my heart with that which breaks Yours". I prayed that phrase, hoping that God would show me the things in my life that I was glossing over or ignoring. The pain of others. The saddness of others. The hurt in my own family. And He sure has.

Today I had to go in to talk to my son's teacher about an incident at school yesterday. It was no biggie really, he's has so many good days that we expected some kind of regression. Especially since his teacher has been away for a week and then my son had been sick for several days. He needed to get back into his routine...

Anyways. The teacher was out of the class for a while yesterday because she had to go down to the Children's Hospital to talk with a host of other experts about a child at the school who was being taken away from his family by Social Services. It really hit me... a child in my son's school was being taken away. This child had spent the last 8 weeks at the school at the Childrens's Hospital, and now that he or she has recovered from whatever abuse, Social Services needed to step in. And it broke my heart. I sat in the truck and cried.

How can these lives swirl around us and we have no idea? I look out at the playground and it's easy to see kids screaming, playing, running. But there are wars being waged. There are hearts being broken, children fighting their way to the top of the heap. Friendships made now may colour their lives forever. Lessons learned now will play out over and over for the rest of their lives.

A group of boys ran by, a trio followed by a straggler. The straggler met my eye and I was struck by what I saw there. He was at least Grade Five, older than my Kindergartener, but as he looked at me I saw the soft roundess of his face, the eager cut of his hair, the blue eyes that laid on me with a little fear because of my adult status. Not yet hardened by a desire to strike out at what scares him, but a softness that said "I still believe that adults can save me".

God, please keep breaking my heart with what breaks yours so that I might be a better person in the eyes of children.

Deluge of Magazines

At the beginning of the month, the mailman begins to look at my house with a heavy sigh and an overly dramatic pursing of the lips. He does so while dragging a bag behind him that is filled to the brim with my favourite indulgence: my magazines.

I'm a magazine, non fiction writer, so I can actually write off many of the subscriptions. Especially since I have a pattern of subscribing to a magazine, then writing for them consistently enough that I get put on their free subscription list.

Right now I get about a dozen magazines each month. That's a lot. It really takes me the rest of the month to find time to read them. And because I'm such a hoarder, I tend to keep them for a long time. Thankfully my husband just steps around the piles of magazines in our room. I do use the old ones... usually for filler in boxes when we move!

Speaking of moving... we have found a perfect, beautiful piece of heaven to call home. We've interviewed for it and gotten to the references stage... please pray with me that we get it!

What the heck...

So... my blog was locked by Blogger's "spam-prevention robots"... what the heck does that mean!

What it meant was I was unable to post anything!

I had to fill out a form to get my blog reviewed by Blogger... unfortunately Blogger doesn't tell you anything about WHY your blog has been locked... just that "On behalf of the robots, we apologize for locking your non-spam blog."

And yet... I have to wait for some real person to come and unlock my blog! Grrr....

Get organized... and make more money!

If there is one thing that can be a time waster (read: money waster), itis disorganization. Last year I was exploring the nether-regions of my email program's archive folders and I found an acceptance from a regional parenting publication on an essay I sent out.

Now, I haven't sent anything out in a long, long time... this email was from 2003! I hadn't followed up and I had definitely not received a check. Had I been more organized and remembered to follow up, I would have made more money and maybe even broken into a market that I have been considering for a long time.

Here's now I became more organized.

Organize your week by having certain tasks set for certain days:

Monday: Querying
Tuesday: Accounting
Wednesday: Refueling
Thursday: Admin/Filing (this includes your email inbox!)
Friday: Idea Harvesting
Saturday: Market Search

You only need to spend an hour on each task, maybe less. Then you can spend more time writing and you won't have to worry that those icky details are taken care of each week.

Querying: Look over your notes to decide which idea (or ideas) you'd like to query today. Match them up with your target market and craft at least one query.

Accounting: Check on overdue invoices, calculate your expenses from the previous week.

Refueling: Take time to read a book of fiction, pick up your bible and read or watch an inspirational movie. Recharge, it's that horrible Wednesday slump!

Admin/Filing: Clean up that desk and make sure everything is filed away.This also includes your email inbox! Check on pending emails or phone calls you are supposed to return.

Idea Harvesting: Read every magazine or newspaper that you subscribe to and make notes on topics you might have something to say about. Read your bible for ideas, pick your favorite bible story and see if there's a correlation between it and your life. Put these notes aside, let them stew over the weekend and see which ones you can query on Monday.

Market Search: Couldn't you just get lost in this task? Identify a few target markets and read about them, make notes, bookmark and highlight those you are interested in.

As today is Monday, I sent out three queries. Two are still out there and one was retured with a rejection but a request for a requery. YAY!

The Velocity of Writing

The definition of velocity is the distance traveled per unit of time. Or it can mean rapidity or speed of motion; swiftness.

This is a key ingredient to writing effectively. You must increase the velocity of your writing.

Some people 'free write' or do 'freefall writing'. Some people write morning pages ala Julia Cameron. (I've been trying those myself, but I am not a morning person so my pages tend to be quite negative.)

It is all related. The key to get writing, it to git to gittin' it and git writing.

Oh would that we could all do that, right?

You can.

It's not easy. I've sat there, staring at the blank screen, being mesmerized by that blank, white space that seems to be swallowing my confidence and drive whole and without pausing to chew it. The only way I've found is to make yourself write. It may be crap. It probably will be crap.

There have been many times that I've started off with:

"Put witty beginning here that pinpoints the market challenges."
"..something here about background info..."
"In XXXX, Paul began buying up property around WHERE THE HECK DID HE LIVE and building LOW INCOME?ECONOMICAL?..."
"something about the horses blah blah blah.."

As I'm writing my book, I often come across parts that need further investigation. But I know that if I stop to research it, I will find myself surfing and wasting time. So I highlight an area and write CHECK or RESEARCH in block lettering so I won't miss it when I'm editing or reviewing what I've written.

You must increase the velocity of your writing if you ever want to get writing with kids around. You may only have five minutes while waiting for school to get out, or ten minutes when both kids are blessedly down for their naps, or a half hour before everyone gets up.

If you ponder and wonder about the perfect way to write that opening sentance, you risk losing important minutes - seconds even! - of writing time.

By increasing your velocity, you increase the word count and increase your odds of finding the perfect wording, the perfect sentance. Sure, you'll have to prune and edit away the crap, but you have something to work with. You have a body of work, fat, plump and ripe for the carving. It can be hard to carve a blank page.

A Low Spot

There are many, many boys in my son's Kindergarten class. All of them full of snails and puppy dog tails and mischievious looks as they shoot bad guys with their fingers and spray spittle around the room.

My son, as I may have mentioned before, is the shortest in the class. He had a rough beginning at the start of the year. He has my temper but not the three decades of anger managment work under his belt. (Well, almost three decades.)

Yesterday he was supposed to go to a playdate with another boy in his class. He'd never been to this boy's house. I just met his mom for the first time last week on the day the two boys decided they liked to hang out. She seemed ok, so we said that Thursday my son would go over to their house. There are three brothers all together and I thought that perhaps my son would enjoy the rough and tumble afternoon. He'd probably come back with a war wound, but it'd be a long way from his heart, I'm sure.

But yesterday, Thursday, came and went and I just sort of forgot. I remembered half-way through the day but I figured my son had forgotten and there was a little boy here I was watching for the day, and, well, I just didn't think about it. My mom picked up my son and brought him home and he didn't remember it at all.

Except I found out today that the other boy did. He asked over and over when my son was coming.

I found out today that this other little boy has been having trouble in school. Suddenly his friends don't want to be friends with him. Suddenly they push him away and say "we don't want to play with you". And apparently his teacher (not my son's teacher) isn't much help.

She said sometimes he comes home from school and cries. He doesn't want to cry at school, even though it would bring attention to his distress. The teacher just doesn't believe that he's gone from the popular kid to the outcast, it seems (there are always many sides).

But where my son wears his feelings right out there on his sleeve, this little boy keeps them hidden in his pocket.

I feel horrible. I can only imagine that this poor guy felt rejected when we didn't show up, with no explanation. In my defense, I couldn't find his mom's number, but I could have looked harder. I found it today.

I asked my son to go say sorry to his friend and to promise that we'd get together next week. I need to fix this.

By the fingernails I tell you

I am hanging on to my twenties by my fingernails. I do not want to let them go. I am going to miss "my twenties". So full of mistakes and trips and falls and wringing of hands... you'd think I'd want to bid them fond farewell and open my arms wide to my thirties, wouldn't you?

Not so.

I am afraid of my thirties. Afraid of not doing all those things that I said I'd do "before I'm thirty". Can I cram them all in in the next two months? Or maybe if I do them by the time I'm 31 I can say I did them "when I was 30".

Goodness I can still remember when I wanted to write a novel by the time I was 20!

So I bring you 20 things I loved about my twenties:

1. Having children when my body still (sorta) bounced back.
2. Reconnecting with the love of my life (read: stalking him back down and roping him for good)
3. Finding two wonderful careers that I loved and figuring out a way to combine them.
4. Learning that it's not all about my opinion.
5. Learning that it's not all about your opinion either.
6. Turning a hobby into a career and finding some great hobbies to replace it.
7. Learning how to manage my own money before I had to manage money with someone. Again.
8. Getting over (sorta) the fact that I didn't get to do the whole "college in my twenties" experience and deciding (definitely) that I'm better for it.
9. Accepting the fact that there is no correlation between who I am and what size of jeans I wear.
10. Learning that I am responsible enough for children... but not responsible enough for a dog.
11. Learning what it truly means to support someone else's dreams when they need you to.
12. Learning how to ask for help.
13. Discovered my faith again.
14. Forgave myself for the mistakes I made as a teenager.
15. Found a husband who has done his own laundry for his entire adult life.
16. Figured out how to accept my friends for who they are and learning how to let the ones go that didn't accept me for who I was.
17. Learned that people will always show you who they are, if you listen and observe.
18. Learned how to trust my gut instinct.
19. Gained control of my temper.
20. Learned how to let go.

Actually, writing out that list has helped me a little... I'm more at peace with watching my twenties go bye-bye when I realize that they have brought me so much and prepared me for my thirties.

Podcast: Secrets of The Writing Mother

This week I participated in an interview with Lyle Lachmuth. I credit Lyle for helping me to get a little 'unstuck' creatively. I may not be following his suggestions exactly (it's too coooold to go out for a walk!!) but I did take them to heart and think on them.

Part of getting unstuck is finding a catalyst. It's like getting your truck stuck in the mud. Sometimes you just need a little something to get some traction and then you need to get out on your own.

The podcast is up on The Writing Mother web site, right on the front page...

Examples of Creative Non Fiction

As per your request, here are some examples of Creative Non Fiction.

1. The essays that won the recent Erma Bombeck contest.
2. Christmas letters.
3. Chicken Soup stories.
4. Autobiographies.
5. Biographies.
6. True Crime stories.

Please go read the essays that won the Erma Bombeck contest, they are truly great reads. I enjoyed every one of them!

Good-bye Ms Callwood

Today, June Callwood died. She was 82. This woman was an amazing pioneer in Canada. She was the original Writing Mother. She and her husband were both writers and they worked from home. They had four children together. The Globe and Mail wrote a marvelous recount of her life. I offer some exceprts.

Motherhood, which Ms. Callwood embraced fulsomely, also turned her into a freelance writer as a way of earning money while staying home with her children.
She wrote her first magazine article (for Liberty Magazine, earning $50) about Violet Milstead, the instructor who was teaching her how to fly a single engine Aeronica Superchief.

She wrote her way through the 40s, 50s, 60s, 70, 80s and 90s. Yes, over six decades of writing. She wrote past the millenium and continued to be an activist in many areas. Not all I personally agreed with, but what does that matter, really. She had a style about her.

When she went to the aid of a demonstrator who was under arrest, she was herself
arrested, hauled off to the notorious Don Jail and charged with obstructing the police. Pierre Berton (obituary Dec. 1, 2004) testified on her behalf at her trial and she was acquitted, but the experience turned her into a social activist, albeit one who was always dressed to the nines complete with earrings, high-heeled shoes and matching handbag.

There is so much to be said about her, so much that I wish I'd known before her passing. You can read a transcript here of her appearance before the Senate in 2004.

We freelancers have been having a very difficult time, because the newspapers and magazines on which we depend — because you cannot make money on books, unless you are privileged to be Margaret Atwood — are depending more on their staff. It is cheaper to hire a freelancer than it is to hire staff, because there are no benefits and, for all the obvious reasons, it is the easiest job to cut.

She was such a beacon.

If you see an injustice being committed, you aren't an observer, you are a
participant.” That didn't mean you had to intervene, she explained, but you
couldn't pretend that you weren't a part of what was happening in front of you.

Her death is a loss. I think the writing community still has much to learn from her.

You should know...

... I am not immune to panic and procrastination.

Right now I have deadlines. Two or three or four... this weekend is my deadline, well today is my deadline for some...

But instead I'm wandering, making more coffee, checking email... ripping some music from my cds...

Do you do this?

Here's what you do. You just sit down and write. Just sit your butt down and write. I preach it. And now I'm going to go practice it.

WAH!

Someone slow down the world please. Pretty please?

Last week my baby girl, 8 months, got her first tooth. This week, my big boy, 5 years, is losing his first tooth.

Why are they growing up so fast!?

I may have overscheduled us for the spring/summer... or the sprunger as it's known in Canuckistan.

My son is enrolled in Gymnastics, T-Ball and Soccer. The baby is enrolled in swimming lessons. We're scheduled Sunday to Thursday. Ooops. I was just talking the other day about getting some 'me' time in a couple nights a week. Then I paid all the fees up for these sports... tonight I was talking to a friend and mentioned my me time plan.

And remembered the upcoming schedule. Crap.

TV Addiction

I think I have it.

I've talked to a few writers who have given up television so that they can become better, more productive writers.

My first reaction is "uh, no, not for me". How would I know if Kate chooses Sawyer or Jack (totally Sawyer), or if Meredith is no longer dark and twisty this week, or if Kitty is a horrible step-mother, or where the heck ER has gone to?

I don't so much love day time TV. I watch 100 Huntley Street at 9 am, that's really my only show. But still the TV is on all day. I have to have that background noise.

But what if I didn't? What if I stopped watching all television during the day and I really did become a better and more productive writer?

A big hurdle would be the kids. My son is five. He knows about Sponge Bob. He knows about Teletoons. I don't think he'll take too kindly to the "but it's better for us, honey" spiel.

I'm not sure what my hang up is. I like the shows, I like TV, I don't want my kids addicted, but I'm so intrigued (and a little jealous) of those that have the fortitude to cut it out of their lives.

What is Creative Non-Fiction?

This question came up in a group that I belong to. The answers varied and the definition couldn't really be agreed upon. However, I offer to you some ideas of what I believe creative non fiction is:

It uses fiction techniques such as characterization, plotting, setting and dialogue to write a piece of non fiction.

It uses actual people and events to tell a story.

It is written from personal experience or it tells the story of someone else.

It uses forms such as letter, memoirs, blog posts, biographies, autobiographies...

Wikipedia defines it as:

Creative nonfiction, also known as literary journalism and narrative journalism, which uses literary skills in the writing of nonfiction. A work of creative nonfiction, if well written, contains accurate and well-researched information and also holds the interest of the reader. Creative nonfiction is contrasted with "research nonfiction" which may contain accurate information, but may not be particularly well written and may not hold the attention of the reader very well.

If you are interested in joining The Writing Mother Creative Non Fiction group, head over here!

Just another day at the office

What does your writing space look like?





If it's anything like mine:





Then it's probably messy!





I do have a desk in my bedroom, it's a corner desk and my regular computer is there. But for actually getting writing done during the day, I need to be out among the masses. (The desk in the room leaves little room for kids)

So I sit here, in the living room with a TV tray in front of me. I sit on the piano bench. The kids play around the rest of the room. My five year old isn't always up for playing with the baby, but the mornings are usually spent together. (The TV isn't always ON, I should mention.)


Notice that the baby has copious amounts of padding around her. She's in this kind of spastic, body-flinging phase.

In fact, I have a confession to make. Yesterday she launched herself off of the bed. Yes. Off the bed. I managed to go five and a half years without dropping a kid and I've let this one fall twice. Gah.

I saw her do it and I just wasn't fast enough. She was sitting in the middle of the bed, kind of cross legged. She leaned forward and I thought, "oh, she's going to try crawling". At that moment she kicked her feet and FLEW off the bed. She landed on her cheek, which I thought was going to bruise, but hasn't. Yet.

This is another reason why I won't be writing in my bedroom any more, unless she's asleep, I can't turn my back on her while she's sitting on the bed.

I remember when I could just lay her down and she'd fall asleep on the bed behind me, but we've entered a new era now. The Mobile Era.

You will also notice TWO bouncy chair-type thingies. The Jumparoo in the top pic and the exersaucer in the second. We perfer to call them the "Circle of Neglect". I still baby wear, I still have my sling, but it doesn't work as well now, she's a little bored playing with my lips, nose, eyes and hair... and to be honest, it hurts like heck when she does. So she gets to play with things now... on her own.

I don't actually neglect her, when she cries or fusses, I pick her up, foresaking the writing. I find that if I do that (let her play independently until she wants me) then she goes for longer periods of time playing on her own. It's amazing that she can be entertained by a stuffed animal or single toy for twenty minutes.


So there you go. I feel like the internets have seen my underwear or something... anyone else want to share?

It's going...

It's going and going and going.

I wonder if I have any advice on "how to write a book". I mean, I am actully writing one, right?

Sometimes writers ask how they can write a book, a query, an article and I feel like I have no answer for them.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.

This book gets written one word at a time. If I get up from this chair once, I get up a hundred times. There's the baby to right (after she topples) and the kindergartener to pick up from school and coffee to make.

One word at a time until at least 1000 words are written each day. Sometimes I write more, sometimes (but rarely) I write less.

It's not easy. Even the most boring topic is still writing, it's still creating. Creating takes energy, sweat, tears even. The guy who flips my burgers can still flip them when he's distracted, tired and cranky. Have you tried to write this way? But you still must do it.

One word at a time. That is the only way.

"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."

Tax Tips for American Writers

Now, I'm Canadian, so I don't know one whit about the US tax system except for one thing: Americans get to write off the interest on their mortgage.

Well, that and Americans pay way less tax than I do!

But the Paperback Writer has some more information for you as well as some resources. Check her out!

Also posting tax tips is Debbie Ridpath Ohi on her blog Will Write for Chocolate. I have only JUST found Debbie's blog, so I shall go peruse now... seems she has some tips for those of us North of the 49th as she's a Canuck too.

Interview: Alyice Edrich

Alyice Edrich has been writing from home since 1999, when she was encouraged by her mother-in-law to pursue a book idea. The book never became published, due to various circumstances, but it was just the nudge she needed to start an exciting career as a freelance writer.

After years of hard work, studying, and dedication, she produces an award-winning publication known as The Dabbling Mum®, three free e-zines, and has self-published several books. She also ghost writes for small businesses, writes columns for both print and online magazines, and has had a few articles included in book compilations.

Some consider her “Super Woman” but she says she’s just a mom with a dream who works very hard at making it all work together. Learn how she manages to juggle it all in our exclusive, one-on-one interview!

1. What came first, being a writer or a mother?

Definitely being a mother came first. When I was a little girl, I was often asked what I wanted to be when I grew up and I could think of nothing more than being a mother. I wanted to have a family of my own one day and raise beautiful, God-fearing, God-loving, happy, healthy, joy-filled children.

When I looked towards my future, I saw Christmases filled with my children and their families—grandchildren, great-grandchildren, cousins, aunts, and uncles—all gathered around a warm fire, listening to Christmas gone by, laughing and giggling as we waited for Santa Clause to come with presents to unwrap. I saw family vacations in Hawaii and the Bahamas and Dude Ranches where we gathered once a year just to relish our time together.

Those are still dreams I hold dear and pray will one day come to pass.

Writing didn’t really take shape, as a career, until my daughter died several years ago. I journaled 24 hours a day through my grief. I journaled about anger and hurt and confusion. I journaled the whys and hows and the good memories. I journaled because I felt closer to by daughter and to God, because it somehow gave me hope and peace of mind. One day, my mother-in-law read my journal entries and told me I should get it published. So I sought publication. It went to the final stages of a big time publisher before it was turned down for being too narrow a market. That fueled the flames to consider writing for a living.

Then one day, after starting a career as a Mobile Notary, I wrote a book on the subject—a book because there wasn’t any of its kind and I wanted to share what I learned, I wanted my life to count for something and it was fun earning money doing something I had a natural talent to do—write.

Researching ways to market that book, I began writing free articles in exchange for advertising. The next thing I knew, I was querying newspapers, small magazines, and starting my own magazine. All it took was a spark—one person’s interest in my writing to tell me that all those years I had written “books” to friends meant there was a writer within trying to get out.


2. How do you manage your work day? Can you give us a ‘day in the life’ snapshot of a regular work day for you?

Over the years I’ve tried many different routines, but I think I’ve finally found one that works for me—though I do occasionally sway from it.

I wake up every morning to breakfast with the kids. In the past, they’d skip breakfast, but after my mom died, I began reading feverently about health and nutrition and taking care of our bodies and realized that even though they hated breakfast, it was too important to skip! So now I have a little breakfast schedule on the refrigerator—ever meal takes no more than 20 minutes to make. I get up early—no small feat since I am not a morning person—and we eat breakfast together. (A true blessing came when the other day my son was asked to say prayers and he said, “I’m thankful for breakfast in the morning.” I looked at him in bewilderment, and he said, “What? It’s true.” Out of the mouth of a 16 year old!)

After the kids leave for school, I check my email and make an entry in my personal blogs (http://shoutlife.com/dabblingmum and http://myspace.com/dabblingmum). Monday, Wednesay, and Friday I post a Q&A on DM Speaks (http://thedabblingmum.blogspot.com/). It’s a fun blog filled with expert advice from business owners, writers, authors, and literary agents. I give myself an hour for this.

Once that is done, I sit down to read my Bible, pray, and then exercise.

I usually start work around 11 am.

My work time varies: writing blog posts for clients, writing columns for online magazines, writing articles or web content for small businesses, or writing content for my latest e-book.

When I am done with work that has to get done I look for more work. I check out job boards like craigslist.com or search online for keywords like, “bloggers for hire” or “parenting articles wanted”. If something catches my eye and the pay is right, I put in a bid.

Sometimes, I write articles that I distribute for free in exchange for advertising space. This is explained in more detail in an article I wrote called, Marketing with Articles. (http://www.thedabblingmum.com/books/marketing_acampaign.htm)

And then there are the days I spend hunting down places to advertise—which is no small task, let me tell you! Advertising in print publications can be quite costly, yet advertising is vital to the success of my e-book business. Sometimes, I am lucky to find online newsletters that I can barter advertising with—they advertise in my e-zine in return I advertise in theirs.

When work is done—usually around 5 pm—I begin cooking dinner for the family. If the kids are in a playful mood, we’ll play a board game. If not, I will watch a television show with them. My daughter is a huge t.v. buff, so we enjoy watching a show and talking about it together. Other times, they just like to be left alone and I give them that space—that option to choose.


3. What is your greatest challenge as a writing mother and how do you overcome it?

My greatest challenge is stopping. As a sole proprietor, everything falls into my lap—advertising, public relations, publicity, marketing, web design, accounting, writing, correspondence, and so forth. There never seems to be enough time in the day to do everything I want to accomplish and it is easy to get burnt out.

Another challenge is getting started. There are days when I simply do not want to work—when I’d rather play hookie surfing the web, getting outside, visiting with people. And I have to force myself to work because if I don’t make time to work, my business will not succeed.

Let me give you an example.

Two years ago, I was making nearly $50,000 from home, before expenses, writing for others and selling my e-books. Last year we moved to a new state and to be quite honest, I was burnt out. I needed a break. I was overdue for a break. I had been going non-stop since I started the business and during those years we moved five times, to five different states, and my husband was a full time college student for three of those years. A lot of weight was on my shoulders and last year I just couldn’t do it anymore. My taxes came back from the tax lady this year. I made $31,000 from home, before expenses—and if I were to be quite honest, half of that was from e-book sales! I literally had to force myself to work every day of last year.

Thank you Alyice!

WAHM Thoughts

I know I didn't have a complete grasp of what it would be like to work at home. I thought I'd be sitting at parks writing and bouncing my baby on my knees while penning great works.

Or, you know, NOT.

I have been trying very hard to stick to some sort of schedule, but these little humans, the ones with the chubby faces and hungry mouths, they kind of want interaction and they refuse to be scheduled beyond the vagaries of "morning nap" and "afternoon nap".

My son is pretty good, although today when I was on the phone with my writing buddy, Tiff, he decided that it would be fun to attack me with nunchucks, yelling like a warrior and spitting spit. Not appropriate behaviour. So he followed it up with some climbing over the baby. Also inappropriate.

(She is learning to sit up and I have pillows propped all around her so if she topples then she won't crack her noggin on the laminate floor.)

I did manage to get my minimum 1000 words written though. It just took me most of the morning. Gee, I remember when I was working outside the home and I could write 1000 words in 15 minutes!

Interested in becoming a copywriter?

I listened in on an online seminar a few weeks ago.

It was a fabulous call for anyone considering a career in copywriting. The call was sponsored by The Copywriting Institute. Terri Levine interviewed Kelly Robbins and asked a ton of questions about what kind of skills you need, how to get started, who hires copywriters and what kind of writer makes a good copywriter!

You can access the audio here.

While we are at this copywriting thang... check out their downloadable handout: Six things every copywriter MUST know to make high profits in copywriting ---- fast.

WAHM Week at the Writing Thoughts Blog

Over on the right hand side, you'll see a bunch of great blogs. One of them is Writing Thoughts which is run by Laura Spencer. She'll be hosting WAHM Week this week. Make sure you stop by!

Will Write for Wine

Now this is my kind of podcast!

From the Lovely Lani Diane Rich.

Of course I'd be equally into "will write for a good pale ale".

Admiration and Resources

I found a writer this week (Jennifer Lawler) whose list of books is truly amazing. 27 non fiction books to her credit. That's the kind of writer I want to be!

As I delved further into her web site, I found some amazing resources for writers.

I hope you enjoy:

Seeking Perfection: What it Is . . . and Isn't
Step1: Focusing
Step 2: Living Mindfully
Step 3: Slowing Down
The Problem with Perfection

Empowering Women Journalists

Maria Antonieta Gomez Alvarez is a 38-year-old woman who lives in Chiapas, at the bottom of Mexico. She has spent her life quietly struggling, as a mother and a midwife, a soldier and an advocate. Today she is a journalist.

Tonita, as she is called, is a squatter in the outskirts of town. Hers is a world of pirated electricity, rebel armies, inequality and poverty. She is a single mother. She is small, with rosy cheeks, and she is very quiet. When I first met her, I worried that she was too shy to be a reporter.

But when this woman speaks, it is impossible not to listen. "There are so many things that the world should know," she says. "As long as no one knows, nothing will change."

Go read more!

Never underestimate the power of...

... a full night's sleep.

Since it was just me and the baby last night I was roaming the house free as I please. Now, that's not to say that I can't roam around, but if I walk past my son's room I'm liable to hear "Mommy, can I have a..." Since my husband wasn't here I could watch whatever I wanted, and could type well into the night without keeping him awake or listening to him snore. (My 'office' is in the bedroom)

I stayed up until about 12:30. The baby woke periodically but I just put her back to sleep and back into the crib. I laid her down for the last time around 12:30 and to my shock, she stayed in there until 8:00 am!

That's 7.5 hours of a bed to myself people!! This hasn't happened in at least two years!!

My son is home tonight, but I'm going to try put her in the crib again.

I do enjoy the co-sleeping. I co-slept with my son for 18 months. But this time I find that I'm sleeping less and it is affecting my moods. I'm just not as good of a mom when I'm sleep deprived and sore from lying in one spot on the queen sized bed. Usually it's right on the edge (can't put the baby on the edge) on my left side.

Here's to another night with the bed to myself!

(Guess I'll need to put away all that laundry that's piled on it right now)

Quiet night

Boy. This is a quiet night!

Hubby is out of town. Son is over at his grandparent's house.

It's just me and the baby.

And the baby is sleeping much longer than she usually does. Not that I'm complaining. I just don't really know what to do with myself.

Write, you say? That would be a great idea. I am, however, watching The Guardian. I'm a sucker for any 'guy in uniform' movie!

It's a little formulaic, but it seems pretty good. Ashton Kutcher is kind of cute, and I like Kevin Costner. Not as much as I like Harrison Ford or Sean Connery mind you.

How to write an Op-Ed piece

There's a very interesting piece in the New York Times about women making a comeback in the Op Ed page. You may need to register to read past the first page, but it's worth it.

During the seminar Ms. Orenstein laid out a basic formula for writing a 750-word op-ed piece (with the caution that “common sense trumps everything I say”): a lead connected to a news hook, a thesis, three points of evidence, conclusion. And don’t forget the “to be sure” paragraph in order to pre-empt your opponents' comeback, she instructed.

Professionalism, my take.

Recently I was involved in a discussion about professionalism with respect to writers. Writing mothers to be precise.

A copywriter needed to attend a meeting with a client. The client knew she was a write at home mom and offered to let her bring her daughter (under 2) with her.

Several people said that it was fine. Afterall, the client said it was ok. Several people said it was not fine, as it was unprofessional. (Those were men, and I shared an immediate eye-roll with the copywriter... these were not writing fathers to the best of my knowledge.)

However, after I stopped rolling my eyes (and before the wind changed and they stayed that way), I realized that my first instinct was that it was inappropriate and unprofessional. I know, you're thinking, aren't you a writing mother?

Yes, I am.

I started thinking about why I felt it was inappropriate. I am generally either writing or parenting. I'm not one who can do both jobs concurrently and do well. I do a lot of writing during naps, after bed time, when the kids are distracted. Perhaps my mind can only run on one track, but I have a hard time juggling the two.

Being a writing mother is about doing what works for you. Writing, mothering, getting by. Leaving the dishes in the sink or cleaning the kitchen before you write. Writing with baby nursing (which I've done) or writing at nap time (which I do now).

Perhaps for this writer and her client, it works. Perhaps this mother CAN be present enough to be professional while at the meeting. I could not.

Professionalism is many things. This is what it is to me:

Being present in mind, body and spirit with a client. Listening with attentiveness. Keeping eye contact and demonstrating good listening skills. Treating everyone around me (including peers) with respect. Being responsible for my actions, with my advice and for my client's time.

I could not look my client in the eye and say that I was doing a great job if I were constantly distracted by my child(ren). He does not need to know that I completed his project by writing until midnight and doing interviews during nap times.

Perhaps, I am not open to being that open with my clients. My children are my private life. I'm a scattered writer, my office is not clean. Perhaps I'm just not comfortable with a client seeing me in my true creative state.

Perhaps I'd rather put on my fancy clothes with my grown-up shoes and meet the client while at my best. While I look like I have everything under control.

Because I can assure you, that's not what it looks like at the home office!

Thoughts from inside the Hemi

Today I drove Major Man to the airport so he could fly away for some training related to his new job. He will be gone for ten days. I felt an almost overwhelming sense of envy as I drove away.

He gets ten nights of sleep. He gets ten breakfasts, ten lunches and ten suppers where he can actually stay seated for the entire meal.

Not to mention the flight. I love flying. I love the airport. The sense of leaving something behind with the hope of something new. I love it. Growing up at the airport I’ve always had a love of flying. I thought briefly of being a pilot – until I expressed that to my father and he said I’d make a better stewardess. Thanks, Dad.

The roads were horrible on the way back, so I didn’t have much time to stew on Major Man’s fortune and my coming ten days of singlemotherhood. I should not be such a baby. I was a single mother for a while, afterall.

I arrived early at my son’s school and was afforded twenty minutes of quiet with a sleeping baby in the truck and my new AlphaSmart Neo in my bag. This is where I typed this post.

I have a pretty good life. Even with our hardships. Even living with my mother and her husband until June. Even with the financial challenges of living in one of the most expensive cities in Canada.

I am warm at night. I have love. I have friendship. I have health.

Speaking of health. I heard on the radio this morning that it is possible for Albertans to opt out of Alberta Health Care. Now, for my American friends I’ll give you a little explanation.

I pay about $3000 per year to Alberta Health. The Health Care up here is NOT free, despite what your politicians may tell you. There’s a thing called the Canada Health Act that basically states it is illegal to charge someone money for something that is provided for free to all Canadians. There shall be no queue jumping here. Never mind the fact that you could die while waiting in line, you shall not pay to get ahead.

It seems, though, that if I choose, I can opt out of paying that $3000 and instead pay for all my health usage when I use it.

At first I was ecstatic. Then I realized that I was a bit of a chicken. What if I need something expensive? Or what if my kids need something expensive? Only 255 Albertans have opted out. I wonder if they are so rich that they don’t have these same worries.

Suddenly I feel a little bit more ok with paying that $3000. Even if all it gives me is a place to stand in line.

More random thoughts from inside the Hemi.

I need to phone the school and tell them to fix their Canadian flag. It’s a disaster. The side attached to the rope is all gathered up, so it makes the flag all pinched and it hangs limply, its outside top corner flapping uselessly in the wind. It’s hardly a picture of freedom and democracy. Something I think Canada is supposed to stand for.

I remember, back when I was in school, we used to take the flag down at the end of each day, and fly it back up in the morning. It was a matter of respect. Not just for the flag, but for us, the citizens of the country, stating to everyone that passed by that hey, we were here. We are inhabiting this place.

That’s why it was so important when an army won a particular city or fort, they’d fly their own flag.

We are here. We have conquered.

Our schools should do the same. They should fly that flag proudly. Despite the commonality of school, it is an accomplishment to show up each day and learn. The majority of children on this planet do not get to go to school every day. The majority of children are not free to learn. We should celebrate our freedom.

I love this time!

My son is half way through Kindergarten and I LOVE this time. He's gained so much knowledge, his social skills are vastly improved and his reasoning skills are better as well.

He'll be playing quietly and suddenly say "Hey! Favourite starts with F!" Or "Hey! Brain and train - they rhyme!"

It's the perfect time to foster a love of words. They are exciting to him, he is energized by figuring things out on his own. I'd love to foster a love of writing as well. He doesn't seem as predisposed to write. When he does write, he wants to write HIS way. It's hard for such a controller like me to let him write when it's not the 'proper' way. But I've been a mom long enough know to many enough mistakes trying to tell him HOW to do something. He reacts the same way as I would if someone were telling ME how to do something. We don't like that.

So I ignore it when he writes his name with a combination of capital and lowercase letters. It's no biggie. I write lowercase to him and he writes however he wants. I just want him to enjoy the writing and the reading on his own terms.

We went skating for the first time yesterday and it was a blast. I feel like I have learned so much as a parent. In my early parenting years I wanted to help him learn to swim or play games, now I know I just need to be present and allow the learning to happen while having fun. He is also a controller. He wants to be in charge as much as I want to be in charge.

As you can imagine we came to loggerheads several times. But this time it was fun. I just praised every attempt and encouraged him every time he fell. We left wanting to go back. It was a success.

Today I sign him up for Gymnastics as well. Plus soccer this summer. Yikes. We're going to be busy!! I've decided not to volunteer as a coach this year. Last year was enough. I like the role of 'just a parent' much better!

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Oh, and hey... this is my 100th post!

Help me PAY OFF MY DEBT!

We're down to the homestretch of debt.

It has been a long year and a half of having DH sitting around the house waiting for his Permanent Resident's card to arrive so he could work!

We had plenty of offers for him to "work under the table", but we chose to do everything the right way. We didn't want to get caught cheating and have him be kicked out. But still... almost a year and a half of waiting...

Plus, we foolishly had a kid in the middle of it all, so I'm on maternity leave. Severe reduction in pay!

But, we're almost debt-free.

Check out my Sales for Writers! There are some excellent deals to be had. No reserves!

Dear:_______

When you follow around after me and re-clean everything I've cleaned, you make me feel a little bit inadequate.

Also, I might just as well not clean, so when you are ready to stop, I'll start cleaning again.

Let me know!

H

The sun is shining just a bit brighter today!

The last few days have been horrible. I've felt overwhelmed and tired. I couldn't write, I couldn't create, I could hardly parent.

A few things helped:

1. I had a free half hour of coaching with online for some support and they came to my resuce with cyber-hugs and letters of support.
   
2. I discussed this with my husband. He and I worked out a new schedule so that my mornings are less stressful. If my mornings are easier then I can start out on the right foot for the rest of the day!

Some days you're the bug

Some days the sun is shining and life is good. Some days you can't get enough of the smell of your children and the sound of your husband's voice. Some days the words flow freely and the writing is easy.

And then there are days like these.

Crying baby. Financial worries. Unfulfillment. Pounding headaches. Family health issues.

What do you do to get past it?

(No. Really. I need suggestions!!)

Books I've Read

Got this list from Kim. I've bolded the ones I've read, I wish it were more:

1. The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown)
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen)
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (J.R.R. Tolkien)
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (J.R.R. Tolkien)
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (J.R.R. Tolkien)
8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery)
9. Outlander (Diana Gabaldon)
10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (J.K. Rowling)
12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)
13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (J.K. Rowling)
14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)
16. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (J.K. Rowling)
17. Fall on Your Knees (Ann-Marie MacDonald)
18. The Stand (Stephen King)
19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (J.K. Rowling)
20. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)
21. The Hobbit (J.R.R. Tolkien)
22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
23. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott)
24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)
25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
26. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams)
27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)
28. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis)
29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
30. Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom)
31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)
33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
34. 1984 (George Orwell)
35. The Mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley)
36. The Pillars of the Earth (Ken Follett)
37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay)
38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb)
39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)
43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella)
44. The Five People You Meet In Heaven (Mitch Albom)
45. Bible
46. Anna Karenina (Leo Tolstoy)
47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
48. Angela’s Ashes (Frank McCourt)
49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
50. She’s Come Undone (Wally Lamb)
51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
52. A Tale of Two Cities (Charles Dickens)
53. Ender’s Game (Orson Scott Card)
54. Great Expectations (Charles Dickens)
55. The Great Gatsby (Scott Fitzgerald)
56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (J.K. Rowling)
58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
59. The Handmaid’s Tale (Margaret Atwood)
60. The Time Traveller’s Wife (Audrew Niffenegger)
61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
63. War and Peace (Tolsoy)
64. Interview With The Vampire (Anne Rice)
65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davies)
66. One Hundred Years Of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
67. The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants (Ann Brashares)
68. Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
69. Les Miserables (Victor Hugo)
70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
71. Bridget Jones’ Diary (Helen Fielding)
72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
73. Shogun (James Clavell)
74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett)
76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
78. The World According To Garp (John Irving)
79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
80. Charlotte’s Web (E.B. White)
81. Not Wanted On The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
82. Of Mice And Men (John Steinbeck)
83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
84. Wizard’s First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
85. Emma (Jane Austen)
86. Watership Down (Richard Adams)
87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
89. Blindness (Jose Saramago)
90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)
91. In the Skin of a Lion (Michael Ondaatje)
92. Lord of the Flies (William Golding)
93. The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)
94. The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)
95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum)
96. The Outsiders (S.E. Hinton)
97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield)
100. Ulysses (James Joyce)

Queen of the Kindergarteners

I've been volunteering regularly at Kindergarten and am getting to know many of the kids in M.'s class. I take the baby with me, she's now 6 months and if I'm not carrying her, she's in her carseat being accosted by kindergarteners - which she quite enjoys.

The kids are a riot, I'm amazed at the variety of maturity levels... some kids look and act like they are much older than they really are. The teacher assures me that the 'more mature' ones have older brothers and sisters, so they have learned to act older.

I worry, though, about my older influence on them.

They were making Spotty Snakes, using white socks, markers and some buttons for eyes. About 6 kids were putting on a puppet show for me and the eye fell of one of the snakes. That's ok, I said, you can just be the one-eyed snake.

Yeah. You have to have your mind in the gutter for that one.

I might not have, but the teacher had just told me a story about her first year of teaching when she told a group of grade five gym students to "grab their balls".

I am learning. Like saying "wonderful!" instead of "perfect" when someone shows me their work. Using the word perfect may create mini-perfectionists.

Energizing Days

Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like your fingers are flying across the keyboard so fast your brain can't keep up?

Many call this a visit by the muse. I don't really believe in muses, but whatever works for ya'! I do love these days, when the writing seems easy and the ideas are all around. When the words form nice little sentences on their own and I don't feel like I'd be better off tongue painting jello on the refrigerator.

I don't usually write to music. Mainly because it's usually me and the kids at home and I don't want to be bopping to the latest tunes and not hear my son calling me to tell me he's cut his leg off or the baby's head is stuck in the stair railing. But today I have blessed childcare and I can crank my tunes up.

It's one of my favorite ways to write. Turning up the music loud enough that I can't hear the keyboard. I don't know why it feels so good, it just does. There's something that distracts me by the clickety-clack of the keyboard. I like the sound of it... when I'm not writing. But there's an intense drive that it triggers in me and when I'm already looking at the deadline and driving towards it, that extra boost doesn't always help.

What am I listening to you ask? Shania Twain's Up album. It's been a long time since I listened to it. As soon as I put it in I realized that the last time I bopped to its funky toons I was newly divorced and had just gone on the first few dates post-divorce. They weren't successful, thank goodness.

Chorus from 'Nah':

You won't find me
Naked and cold justa sittin'on the doctor's table
Waitin' to be told justa why
I'm no longer able
To feel my heart beatin'--give me
a good reason why!
I kinda went numb
just around about the time you told me
You were movin' on, and yousaid that you were gonna phone me
It's been so long, and there ain't nothin' wrong with the line

The whole album was really a soundtrack for my life at the time. Just listening to it reminds me how far I've come.

Chorus from 'She's Not Just a Pretty Face':

She's -- not -- just a pretty face
She's -- got -- everything it takes
She's -- mother -- of the human race
She's -- not -- just a pretty face

Chorus from 'I Ain't Goin' Down':

I'm gonna hold on--
'cause what I believe in is so strong
No matter how long, no one
Can tell me I'm wrong--I ain't goin' down

All these songs are written by Shania Twain and her husband Mutt Lange. I look forward to her next album...

The Break

I have started a new policy in my home office. As soon as I make my deadlines, I take two days off. Two.

The first one is usually full of me pacing around trying to figure out what I should be writing. The second is actually relaxing. I always have something that I could be writing, but I don't think it's healthy for me to always be working.

Husband starts his job full time next Thursday. He's been home for almost 18 months while getting the proper visa to work here in Canada, so it's new for us. The other day my son asked "why is it just me and mommy and E at home all the time now?" Hubby has been going to the coffee shop to study for this test he had to take last Saturday before he could be employed.

The test that he practically ACED by the way. If you need a Financial Planner in Calgary, he's your guy!

I'm sitting in bed right now, typing on my laptop. I should probably be asleep... but it's nice to get some uninterrupted writing time. Kids are asleep in their room and it's quiet in the house. This is a good time to write. Of course it's even better if you've had a chance to take a nap in the afternoon!

Finding the WHY

Poynter Online has an excellent article up about finding the meaning behind our writing.

What's the "Why" in Your Work?

No matter your career path -- journalism, PR or others -- it's possible to find meaning in your work. But how arenewsrooms, caught in the rush of transition, searching for that meaning?

It's focused on journalism and non-fiction and really spoke to me this morning. We all have jobs that we do that feel small or feel unimportant. We need to be really connected to why we write to get that satisfaction each day.

The litany of challenges facing newspapers, broadcast TV, and yes, the Internet, too, is familiar to us all. And every day, the urgency to respond to those challenges intensifies.

It's in all of that urgency that I worry we'll leave meaning behind.

We must learn to shoot video, learn to record audio, learn to blog, learn to podcast, learn to chat online, learn to file multiple times for the Web and then file for the paper and our newscasts, learn to point our stories forward because so much of our audience "already knows," learn to post content produced by our users, learn to publish news reported by the public.

Are we clear about why?

There are plenty of days that I'm unclear. Here's to working on the WHY!