We've all heard by now that a woman in California had 8 kids. She's apparently unemployed and she had 6 kids aready. Last week in my city a 60 year old woman gave birth to twins. Everyone is upset by both doctors because ethically they should not have a) implanted any thing in the 60 year old's uterus because she's "too old" and b) should have only implanted one (maaaybe two) into the other mother's uterus because she's unemployed.
But here's the thing. Many might know that I'm anti-abortion. As a Christian, I think life starts at conception. Or, to be more specific, I can't say it doesn't start at conception and I think that we're unable to tell when that's a small human life or not. I think we need to protect it.
Now let's have a little side bar here about terminology. The terms "pro life and pro choice" are often thrown around because the people who do not want abortions to occur want to insinuation that the pro-abortionists are "anti-life" and the people who are ok with abortions occuring want to insinuate that the anti-abortionist want to strip away all choices. I want to be really clear... I don't know what the answer is for the world. I do not like abortions, I think that we have no idea when life starts and to say that it's not life because it can't exist outside a uterus (a fetus' natural habitat) is like saying if you put a man on Mars and he dies then he's not human becuase he was supposed to stay in his natural habitat where he could live and breathe.
So anyway. My thesis statement today is that if you are pro-choice and you believe a woman has a right to an abortion, then I believe you cannot criticize either of these women for their choices.... because it was her uterus and she used it the way she wanted to.
But what about the babies? Yes, what about them? I think that it will probably be tough. Not nearly as tough as, say, being aborted.
What about the cost to society? Yes, the treatments for fertility probably cost society and so did taking care of the babies in a hospital after they were born. How much do you think abortions cost society each year? I can tell you. In Canada there are approximately 100,000 abortions each year. Each abortion costs about $1000. That's $100,000,000.
Now, I'm not saying I'm right... I'm open to being wrong, so please have a smidgen of compassion if I've offended you and offer a contradictory opinion, I do want to hear it.
But my question is this... why is it ok for a woman to have an abortion (in the quantity she chooses and whenver she wants) because it's her body (her uterus) and not ok for her to have kids in the quantity she chooses, whenever she wants? And question two... why are the doctor's in trouble? Why are they investigated for doing what both women wanted?
Saturday, February 07, 2009
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Side effects
I've found a side effect of doing one of those "25 things" lists is that you start remembering all the crazy little things from your childhood or young adulthood that you had long since forgotten. Memories beget memories I guess.
I have always had an entrepreneurial spirit. I think. I always thought that if I had a skill, then I'd just go DO that and I was certain someone would pay me. Now, that didn't mean I always had the courage to take risks, or the smarts to know what to do to make my business stay afloat. I am horrible at bookkeeping and accounting. And though there may be some mental block created when you say "I'm horrible at..." I think it's more that, well, I hate numbers. They didn't really do testing when I was a child, but I'm certain I have a math disability of some sort.
As a child I lived briefly in a small town called Bradwell. It actually didn't really qualify as a town, I think that the correct term is "hamlet". There were less than 150 people living there and everyone knew everyone. We lived in a little trailer that was across the street from my cousins (who had a larger house) and down the street from grandma and grandpa's big house. One day I decided to set up a shop.
I was selling rocks. I had some sort of shelf and upon it I placed my carefully selected rocks. I am not sure if I painted them or not, though I do recall some kind of painting that involved mud. But this was small town Saskatchewan and we had enough mud to go around.
Now, understand that no one drove their car through town. You drove out of town, you drove into town, but you didn't exactly cruise the dozen or so streets that made up the village. No one passed by.
So, as you guessed it, that little venture failed. Or I became bored of standing in the summer sun. Not exactly a "little girl sells lemonade and makes a million dollars" type of story, but it does have a purpose.
You can try and fail and try and fail and try and fail and find success - as long as you keep trying. I have a family member who once accused me of hopping from thing to thing, job to job, infatuation to infatuation and expecting my family to care about every little venture. Now, he was trying to be hurtful and to some extent it worked. But when I thought about it later, I realized that what he was accusing me of wasn't all that horrible.
Yep, I've tried many different jobs, lived in different places and been going in many different directions in my life. I've been a horse trainer, office girl, feedlot worker, feed truck driver, cook, bartender, waitress, day care provider, teacher, student, sales person, manager. And to be honest, I'm never really satisfied with what I'm doing because no matter what job title I've held, for the most part you could add "and writer" onto the end of it - that's always been the suffix of who I am.
But I'm not sure I'll ever JUST write full time because at the moment I am quite enjoying my job and all it's benefits - never mind that I adore the company and think there's more for me there. It offers me the ability to exercise my entrepreneurial muscle without a whole ton of risk, I get to be creative and write, and (let's face it) I have a job that let's me have some sense of responsibility. (read: I get to be in charge of my little corner)
And it took me a while to realize that sales is a part of who I am. My husband doesnt quite understand this as he despises sales and salespeople. But really, he just hates to be sold, which is quite different. Sales, to me, is simply providing for others what they need. Or meeting the needs of others.
Which is why I feel that being a writer - especially a freelance writer - is so much more about SALES than it is about actually writing. Because you can be a writer and not be a freelance writer. There are millions of writers in this world from the teenager writing poetry in her diary to the best selling author with forty books under her belt. But to be a writer who SELLS her work, you must.... sell.
Now, it really goes without saying that all writers must have a focus on improving their writing. Good writing will always sell if the writer puts the words on the market. How do I know this? Because even bad writing sells when it's put on the market. Witness the transactions occuring on sites like elance.com where yes, yes, yes, some writers have gotten their start. But the vast majority of transactions that occur there are low-paying work for bad writing. Yes, I said it, bad writing. Because the vast majority of writers who start there, are newbies who are trying to get a foothold in the market, who think they have to sell some rocks before they can move up to selling a mountain.
But if you have a mountain inside you? Then just start there and sell that.
Huh. I think I have another book to write...
I have always had an entrepreneurial spirit. I think. I always thought that if I had a skill, then I'd just go DO that and I was certain someone would pay me. Now, that didn't mean I always had the courage to take risks, or the smarts to know what to do to make my business stay afloat. I am horrible at bookkeeping and accounting. And though there may be some mental block created when you say "I'm horrible at..." I think it's more that, well, I hate numbers. They didn't really do testing when I was a child, but I'm certain I have a math disability of some sort.
As a child I lived briefly in a small town called Bradwell. It actually didn't really qualify as a town, I think that the correct term is "hamlet". There were less than 150 people living there and everyone knew everyone. We lived in a little trailer that was across the street from my cousins (who had a larger house) and down the street from grandma and grandpa's big house. One day I decided to set up a shop.
I was selling rocks. I had some sort of shelf and upon it I placed my carefully selected rocks. I am not sure if I painted them or not, though I do recall some kind of painting that involved mud. But this was small town Saskatchewan and we had enough mud to go around.
Now, understand that no one drove their car through town. You drove out of town, you drove into town, but you didn't exactly cruise the dozen or so streets that made up the village. No one passed by.
So, as you guessed it, that little venture failed. Or I became bored of standing in the summer sun. Not exactly a "little girl sells lemonade and makes a million dollars" type of story, but it does have a purpose.
You can try and fail and try and fail and try and fail and find success - as long as you keep trying. I have a family member who once accused me of hopping from thing to thing, job to job, infatuation to infatuation and expecting my family to care about every little venture. Now, he was trying to be hurtful and to some extent it worked. But when I thought about it later, I realized that what he was accusing me of wasn't all that horrible.
Yep, I've tried many different jobs, lived in different places and been going in many different directions in my life. I've been a horse trainer, office girl, feedlot worker, feed truck driver, cook, bartender, waitress, day care provider, teacher, student, sales person, manager. And to be honest, I'm never really satisfied with what I'm doing because no matter what job title I've held, for the most part you could add "and writer" onto the end of it - that's always been the suffix of who I am.
But I'm not sure I'll ever JUST write full time because at the moment I am quite enjoying my job and all it's benefits - never mind that I adore the company and think there's more for me there. It offers me the ability to exercise my entrepreneurial muscle without a whole ton of risk, I get to be creative and write, and (let's face it) I have a job that let's me have some sense of responsibility. (read: I get to be in charge of my little corner)
And it took me a while to realize that sales is a part of who I am. My husband doesnt quite understand this as he despises sales and salespeople. But really, he just hates to be sold, which is quite different. Sales, to me, is simply providing for others what they need. Or meeting the needs of others.
Which is why I feel that being a writer - especially a freelance writer - is so much more about SALES than it is about actually writing. Because you can be a writer and not be a freelance writer. There are millions of writers in this world from the teenager writing poetry in her diary to the best selling author with forty books under her belt. But to be a writer who SELLS her work, you must.... sell.
Now, it really goes without saying that all writers must have a focus on improving their writing. Good writing will always sell if the writer puts the words on the market. How do I know this? Because even bad writing sells when it's put on the market. Witness the transactions occuring on sites like elance.com where yes, yes, yes, some writers have gotten their start. But the vast majority of transactions that occur there are low-paying work for bad writing. Yes, I said it, bad writing. Because the vast majority of writers who start there, are newbies who are trying to get a foothold in the market, who think they have to sell some rocks before they can move up to selling a mountain.
But if you have a mountain inside you? Then just start there and sell that.
Huh. I think I have another book to write...
Friday, January 30, 2009
Random Bits of Life
The other day I stopped by my bank and as I was heading back to my van, I looked into the car next to me. There was an older couple in the little red Vibe and between them, on the centre console was a cat, just happy as can be looking out the window. In the back, was a very large bulldog. How odd, I thought, to travel around with a bulldog and a cat. I've never taken a trip with a cat yet that didn't involve it velcro'd to my face or head in some fashion.
***
A young girl stopped by the house some weeks ago asking to see my son. She is probably about nine and my son is seven. She was wearing lipstick. Despite this, I still think she's a nice girl. My son seems to think she's ok as well. Her dad owns a nearby store and I had stopped in to pick something up yesterday. Normally this girl is in there but this night, her sister or cousin was there instead. As I climbed back into the van my son said "I knew that wasn't her. Taylor is much wider than that girl."
Ummmm. Not sure how to have that talk with him. Might start with "here's a tip: never, ever describe a girl in terms of width."
***
***
A young girl stopped by the house some weeks ago asking to see my son. She is probably about nine and my son is seven. She was wearing lipstick. Despite this, I still think she's a nice girl. My son seems to think she's ok as well. Her dad owns a nearby store and I had stopped in to pick something up yesterday. Normally this girl is in there but this night, her sister or cousin was there instead. As I climbed back into the van my son said "I knew that wasn't her. Taylor is much wider than that girl."
Ummmm. Not sure how to have that talk with him. Might start with "here's a tip: never, ever describe a girl in terms of width."
***
Sunday, January 18, 2009
25 Things You Don't Know About Me
I've avoided writing one of these... but I've been tagged several times now and my reluctance is being overshadowed by my guilt for not responding. Damn you fellow bloggers!
The reason I struggle is that I think I live my life fairly transparently. I'm a bit of an over-sharer to tell you the truth. I can always be counted on to say something that will result in at least one "oh no, she did NOT just say..."
I've been trying to curb that little habit.
So, off we go:
1. I've suntanned topless.
2. I've been kicked out of a country.
3. As a teenager I once got so drunk I peed the bed. "oh no, she did NOT just say..."
4. I've NEVER been that drunk again.
5. Except when Jim was pouring.
6. I do not have a drinking problem. Really. And I'm not bragging about being drunk either. I think stupidity can happen once a decade...
7. Six was kind of a cheater one, so is this. In keeping with this theme, I've never, ever cheated on a test.
8. I cannot stand to be late. For anything. Both my kids were born late. The little turds.
9. In the past week I've watched Transformers over ten times. I just like the movie and I have to have background noise, even when I'm sleeping and hacking on the couch.
10. There are days that I understand WHY someone could hit a child. It takes every ounce of effort to not smack one of mine.
11. Just after I wrote that, my daughter had a melt down. I did not smack her, don't worry.
12. I am a horrible housekeeper. I regularly have more laundry lying in front of the washing machine than I do in my closets. I think that's the only way I have room for all the clothes.
13. The only way I know to do things is by jumping in over my head.
14. I have two compression fractures in my back. Or had, I think they fuse or something. I don't have any pain.
15. I'm running my first 10k in March and I haven't been running in over a month. (see: jumps in over head)
16. I love writing and I hate writing, all at the same time. I love to hate or I hate to love. It makes me crazy and I can't NOT do it.
17. I did not cheat on my first boyfriend, but I wanted to. And that's why I broke up with him. And then I didn't do anything with anyone... I don't deal well with guilt.
18. My daughter is SO MUCH like me that I worry for her future. She's destined to make her life more difficult than it needs to be.
19. My second cousin, Keith, is very, very different from me. He's here on the left...
20. Many days I can go until 3 pm and only drink coffee.... it's not healthy at all and I'm trying to change that.
21. My biggest, most favourite "splurge" is an afternoon nap.
22. I suspect that I have ADHD-I. But then again, so does every other writing mother I think... I'm to afraid to get tested because I don't want to use it as an excuse. I just want to will myself to do better job at being organized and staying focused.
23. I think people that volunteer or give money to help animals are chickens. I think it's much more brave and compassionate to volunteer to help out the homeless or drug addicts or any other fallible human being. It's easy to love a puppy. Not so easy to hold the hand of a drug addict and say, "I care".
24. I can be very judgmental. I'm working on that.
25. I worry that I will end up alone and that all my friends and family will eventually leave me.
So, that's the list! Now... who to tag...
(On Facebook I did a second list, which I thought was much better.)
Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)
1. I cry very easily. I cry when I’m happy, sad, frustrated, excited or angry. I cry every Sunday at Church because the music is always so beautiful.
2. I refuse to take the Lord's name in vain, but I will say the f-word when angry.
3. I think that the hardest job on the planet is being a GOOD MOTHER. You can be a mom with a uterus and a few too many shots of tequila, but to be a good mother is very, very hard and I’m never sure I’m actually doing it.
4. One of my biggest faults is that I’m convinced everyone else is happier than me, having more fun and doing more important things with their lives. I’ve always been afraid to be left behind.
5. I’m a huge procrastinator. I think it has something to do with part of my creative process as a writer, but that doesn’t explain why I fill the sink up with water and leave the dishes in there overnight. Procrastination makes me furious. I once bought a present for a friend and kept meaning to send it to her. And then she died. I can’t forgive myself for that.
6. I wish I were a kinder mother and person. Some of my employees nicknamed me The General. I’m also the disciplinarian at home.
7. I didn’t think I was a Type-A person until I said that to a friend and she laughed her butt off at me.
8. I have high expectations for people, but they are never as high as the ones I have for myself. I worry that I’ll accomplish something big and never be able to enjoy it. I think we should enjoy our successes.
9. I am inherently lazy. My biggest guilty pleasure is an afternoon nap. I would never finish anything without an external deadline.
10. Thank the good Lord that I have an internal editor because if I said have the things that were in my head … I’m sure I would be institutionalized.
11. I sort of cheated and wrote one of these already and then all my friends wrote theirs and I needed a second draft.
12. My parents used to live in a tent in the Northwest Territories. Or maybe the Yukon. I can’t remember (cause I wasn’t there).
13. I’ve lived in Canada, Barbados and Austria. But I’ve lived in Calgary, Alberta since 1988 and have lived in over 30 houses in this city alone. I finally bought a house last fall and I’m not moving for a good long time.
14. I almost joined the Army. I had applied for a job overseas and gone for an interview with the Armed Forces… I was 18 and couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do so I decided whichever job called me first would be the one I’d do. The job overseas called.
15. I met my husband while I was overseas because I got kicked out of the country I was working in (Austria) for not having a work visa. We went on a roadtrip to Italy and that’s where I met Randy. I loved him the moment I saw him.
16. Years later I read one of the letters I sent to him after I went back to work in Austria and I know why he ran screaming way.
17. I didn’t marry him until 9 years, another marriage and one child later. God Bless The Broken Road by Rascal Flatts is our song.
18. I loved him for a long time and always wanted to be an Army Wife. And then when I married him (we eloped), he wasn’t in the army any more. Oh well, I’d take him over the army any day.
19. My mother calls my daughter “payback”. During the writing of these 25 things she has puked, thrown a temper tantrum, been sweet as an angel and now I’ve walked her back to her bed for the seventh time. Payback is a youknowhat, that’s for sure.
20. I think Obama is very attractive. I thought Clinton was a Pervy McPervyton the first moment I saw him. Canada has never had an attractive Prime Minister.
21. Of course, I’ve always found American men more attractive than Canadian ones. Canadian accents are never attractive.
22. My favorite movie of all time is Transformers. I cried in the theatre when they captured Bumblebee.
23. It’s been well over a year since I rode a horse and I’m afraid that I’ll never own one again.
24. I loved school. I would love to go back to school full-time. But I have no idea what I’d take. I’ve alternated between: veterinarian, war correspondent, journalist, photographer, nurse, doctor, teacher and politician. But the only thing I know how to do well is write.
25. I am absolutely addicted to buying books. I have close to 1000 and many I haven’t read yet.
The reason I struggle is that I think I live my life fairly transparently. I'm a bit of an over-sharer to tell you the truth. I can always be counted on to say something that will result in at least one "oh no, she did NOT just say..."
I've been trying to curb that little habit.
So, off we go:
1. I've suntanned topless.
2. I've been kicked out of a country.
3. As a teenager I once got so drunk I peed the bed. "oh no, she did NOT just say..."
4. I've NEVER been that drunk again.
5. Except when Jim was pouring.
6. I do not have a drinking problem. Really. And I'm not bragging about being drunk either. I think stupidity can happen once a decade...
7. Six was kind of a cheater one, so is this. In keeping with this theme, I've never, ever cheated on a test.
8. I cannot stand to be late. For anything. Both my kids were born late. The little turds.
9. In the past week I've watched Transformers over ten times. I just like the movie and I have to have background noise, even when I'm sleeping and hacking on the couch.
10. There are days that I understand WHY someone could hit a child. It takes every ounce of effort to not smack one of mine.
11. Just after I wrote that, my daughter had a melt down. I did not smack her, don't worry.
12. I am a horrible housekeeper. I regularly have more laundry lying in front of the washing machine than I do in my closets. I think that's the only way I have room for all the clothes.
13. The only way I know to do things is by jumping in over my head.
14. I have two compression fractures in my back. Or had, I think they fuse or something. I don't have any pain.
15. I'm running my first 10k in March and I haven't been running in over a month. (see: jumps in over head)
16. I love writing and I hate writing, all at the same time. I love to hate or I hate to love. It makes me crazy and I can't NOT do it.
17. I did not cheat on my first boyfriend, but I wanted to. And that's why I broke up with him. And then I didn't do anything with anyone... I don't deal well with guilt.
18. My daughter is SO MUCH like me that I worry for her future. She's destined to make her life more difficult than it needs to be.
19. My second cousin, Keith, is very, very different from me. He's here on the left...
20. Many days I can go until 3 pm and only drink coffee.... it's not healthy at all and I'm trying to change that.
21. My biggest, most favourite "splurge" is an afternoon nap.
22. I suspect that I have ADHD-I. But then again, so does every other writing mother I think... I'm to afraid to get tested because I don't want to use it as an excuse. I just want to will myself to do better job at being organized and staying focused.
23. I think people that volunteer or give money to help animals are chickens. I think it's much more brave and compassionate to volunteer to help out the homeless or drug addicts or any other fallible human being. It's easy to love a puppy. Not so easy to hold the hand of a drug addict and say, "I care".
24. I can be very judgmental. I'm working on that.
25. I worry that I will end up alone and that all my friends and family will eventually leave me.
So, that's the list! Now... who to tag...
(On Facebook I did a second list, which I thought was much better.)
Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)
1. I cry very easily. I cry when I’m happy, sad, frustrated, excited or angry. I cry every Sunday at Church because the music is always so beautiful.
2. I refuse to take the Lord's name in vain, but I will say the f-word when angry.
3. I think that the hardest job on the planet is being a GOOD MOTHER. You can be a mom with a uterus and a few too many shots of tequila, but to be a good mother is very, very hard and I’m never sure I’m actually doing it.
4. One of my biggest faults is that I’m convinced everyone else is happier than me, having more fun and doing more important things with their lives. I’ve always been afraid to be left behind.
5. I’m a huge procrastinator. I think it has something to do with part of my creative process as a writer, but that doesn’t explain why I fill the sink up with water and leave the dishes in there overnight. Procrastination makes me furious. I once bought a present for a friend and kept meaning to send it to her. And then she died. I can’t forgive myself for that.
6. I wish I were a kinder mother and person. Some of my employees nicknamed me The General. I’m also the disciplinarian at home.
7. I didn’t think I was a Type-A person until I said that to a friend and she laughed her butt off at me.
8. I have high expectations for people, but they are never as high as the ones I have for myself. I worry that I’ll accomplish something big and never be able to enjoy it. I think we should enjoy our successes.
9. I am inherently lazy. My biggest guilty pleasure is an afternoon nap. I would never finish anything without an external deadline.
10. Thank the good Lord that I have an internal editor because if I said have the things that were in my head … I’m sure I would be institutionalized.
11. I sort of cheated and wrote one of these already and then all my friends wrote theirs and I needed a second draft.
12. My parents used to live in a tent in the Northwest Territories. Or maybe the Yukon. I can’t remember (cause I wasn’t there).
13. I’ve lived in Canada, Barbados and Austria. But I’ve lived in Calgary, Alberta since 1988 and have lived in over 30 houses in this city alone. I finally bought a house last fall and I’m not moving for a good long time.
14. I almost joined the Army. I had applied for a job overseas and gone for an interview with the Armed Forces… I was 18 and couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do so I decided whichever job called me first would be the one I’d do. The job overseas called.
15. I met my husband while I was overseas because I got kicked out of the country I was working in (Austria) for not having a work visa. We went on a roadtrip to Italy and that’s where I met Randy. I loved him the moment I saw him.
16. Years later I read one of the letters I sent to him after I went back to work in Austria and I know why he ran screaming way.
17. I didn’t marry him until 9 years, another marriage and one child later. God Bless The Broken Road by Rascal Flatts is our song.
18. I loved him for a long time and always wanted to be an Army Wife. And then when I married him (we eloped), he wasn’t in the army any more. Oh well, I’d take him over the army any day.
19. My mother calls my daughter “payback”. During the writing of these 25 things she has puked, thrown a temper tantrum, been sweet as an angel and now I’ve walked her back to her bed for the seventh time. Payback is a youknowhat, that’s for sure.
20. I think Obama is very attractive. I thought Clinton was a Pervy McPervyton the first moment I saw him. Canada has never had an attractive Prime Minister.
21. Of course, I’ve always found American men more attractive than Canadian ones. Canadian accents are never attractive.
22. My favorite movie of all time is Transformers. I cried in the theatre when they captured Bumblebee.
23. It’s been well over a year since I rode a horse and I’m afraid that I’ll never own one again.
24. I loved school. I would love to go back to school full-time. But I have no idea what I’d take. I’ve alternated between: veterinarian, war correspondent, journalist, photographer, nurse, doctor, teacher and politician. But the only thing I know how to do well is write.
25. I am absolutely addicted to buying books. I have close to 1000 and many I haven’t read yet.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Open Letter to Airlines
I'm writing to you because you are listed as a customer of Cascade Aerospace.
I am aware that Cascade Aerospace has had several health and safety violations and accidents at their Abbotsford hanger. In fact, their workers are constantly exposed to dangerous chemicals that leave them disoriented and sick *while working on aircraft*. The company has, at times, insisted that they keep working and has fired workers who leave when sick.
This situation was recently profiled on Kathy Tomlinson's Go Public show.
Please don't just read the article and watch the video but read the comments made my previous employees and current employees who are too afraid to leave their names. Note that WorkSafeBC also responded in the comments but did not even get the name of the company correct.
I would ask that you consider switching service providers or contacting Cascade and insisting that they fix the problems at that hangar. Do not believe them when they try to discredit the former employees that were featured on that program. My father, Paul Atton, is one of those employees and has lost everything: his health, his wife and his career. He was an aircraft maintenance engineer and passionate about his work. He was very, very good at it and has always had a high level of integrity.
Now he spends days in bed, sometimes cannot get out of bed in pain. He is homeless but chooses to stay in BC where he can continue his fight against Cascade and where his doctor is, the only one who has been able to get him to a semi-functioning state. However his mind still wanders, he still experiences rages and mood swings and he is half the man he once was. He has been told that he will likely be diagnosed with Alzheimer's in five years.
This is the man who used to bike miles to work in the snow or climb a mountain or rock wall. He learned to snowboard when he was 50. There are days he cannot walk to get the mail.
We grew up around the airport and I love to fly. My daughter few on 18 flights before she was 18 months old. I love the industry.
I hope to hear from you.
Heather Cook
403-569-1500
hlcook@shaw.ca
I am aware that Cascade Aerospace has had several health and safety violations and accidents at their Abbotsford hanger. In fact, their workers are constantly exposed to dangerous chemicals that leave them disoriented and sick *while working on aircraft*. The company has, at times, insisted that they keep working and has fired workers who leave when sick.
This situation was recently profiled on Kathy Tomlinson's Go Public show.
Please don't just read the article and watch the video but read the comments made my previous employees and current employees who are too afraid to leave their names. Note that WorkSafeBC also responded in the comments but did not even get the name of the company correct.
I would ask that you consider switching service providers or contacting Cascade and insisting that they fix the problems at that hangar. Do not believe them when they try to discredit the former employees that were featured on that program. My father, Paul Atton, is one of those employees and has lost everything: his health, his wife and his career. He was an aircraft maintenance engineer and passionate about his work. He was very, very good at it and has always had a high level of integrity.
Now he spends days in bed, sometimes cannot get out of bed in pain. He is homeless but chooses to stay in BC where he can continue his fight against Cascade and where his doctor is, the only one who has been able to get him to a semi-functioning state. However his mind still wanders, he still experiences rages and mood swings and he is half the man he once was. He has been told that he will likely be diagnosed with Alzheimer's in five years.
This is the man who used to bike miles to work in the snow or climb a mountain or rock wall. He learned to snowboard when he was 50. There are days he cannot walk to get the mail.
We grew up around the airport and I love to fly. My daughter few on 18 flights before she was 18 months old. I love the industry.
I hope to hear from you.
Heather Cook
403-569-1500
hlcook@shaw.ca
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Ahhh that brings back memories.
Watching Law & Order and there's a character named Heather. She used to be a little chubby. She ran away from home after her sister called her a name.
I remember that name.
Heifer.
I remember that name.
Heifer.
Monday, January 05, 2009
Boys and Girls
Army Boy is almost seven AND A HALF and he's all gangly arms, pseudo-cool moves, bruises and spacey teeth. I'm pretty used to having a gaggly gaggle of boys running around the house, down the block, at the park...
The other day the doorbell rang. When I opened the door, there stood a girl. At LEAST a year older.
Wearing lipstick.
To see my baby boy.
He wasn't home, so I gave her our phone number. Hey, it's cold here and no one wants to walk two blocks when it's -30C. Well. Now they sit on the phone and chat. Army Boy plays XBox while the phone sits beside him with the speaker on. They complain about little sisters. They talk about school.
And so it begins.
The other day the doorbell rang. When I opened the door, there stood a girl. At LEAST a year older.
Wearing lipstick.
To see my baby boy.
He wasn't home, so I gave her our phone number. Hey, it's cold here and no one wants to walk two blocks when it's -30C. Well. Now they sit on the phone and chat. Army Boy plays XBox while the phone sits beside him with the speaker on. They complain about little sisters. They talk about school.
And so it begins.
Friday, January 02, 2009
The making (or not) of goals
For the first time in a long time, I'm having difficulty creating any goals for 2009. It could be that I'm having a very rough week and my only goals at the moment are getting through the next 24 hours. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
So I'm going to review some goals from past years.
2005
1. Credit Cards paid off by March 31st. This would effectively
take me out of debt - on paper. There's still a Legal Aid bill from my
divorce, but there is no interest charged so it can continue to be
paid off in pre-authorized payments. My car is in my name and registered to
me, but the loan is not - therefore it does not show up as
'my' debt.
2. 10% increase in income from writing. Rather than do 10% more,
I'm going to become more efficient (buying the laptop was a start) and more
effective (by charging more).
3. One more column. I have two: both horse related. I'd like to
develop one either online or in print that is not related to the horse
industry. Maybe writing related.
4. Finish 2 non-fiction books that are currently in the works and
start developing my fiction writing.*
*I finished one proposal and the other one was crap
2006
Apparently I made no resolutions!
2007
** yes, if by "new accounting system" you mean, continue to throw receipts on to a pile called "ignore".
*** I did, into another rental...
2008
I didn't make any resolutions that I can find. I did write about 2008 being my Year of Hope though.
I did buy a house, finish my second book (and edits on the first), celebrate 3 years of marriage and my first year as a manager at work.
So I have tried a couple of different ways of resolving to resolve. I've made goals, I've set themes, I've NOT made goals. I can honestly say I do not know what works best for me. At the moment I can't see my way out of my little raincloud to decide what I want to do.
The skies will clear soon. I hope.
So I'm going to review some goals from past years.
2005
take me out of debt - on paper. There's still a Legal Aid bill from my
divorce, but there is no interest charged so it can continue to be
paid off in pre-authorized payments. My car is in my name and registered to
me, but the loan is not - therefore it does not show up as
'my' debt.
2. 10% increase in income from writing. Rather than do 10% more,
I'm going to become more efficient (buying the laptop was a start) and more
effective (by charging more).
3. One more column. I have two: both horse related. I'd like to
develop one either online or in print that is not related to the horse
industry. Maybe writing related.
4. Finish 2 non-fiction books that are currently in the works and
start developing my fiction writing.*
*I finished one proposal and the other one was crap
2006
Apparently I made no resolutions!
2007
Write Rookie Reiner (yeah, I should think so... I'm contracted to do it now!)Increase writing income by 10-15%- Learn to do my own taxes
- Reach the milestone of 300 published articles (I'm at about 210)
- Finish my ICEA coursework and attend the September convention.
- Finish two more Book Proposals (
one horse bookand one non-horse book*) - Set up new accounting system**.
Pay off two credit cards, the line of credit and cancel one card.Move. (as in... out of this house...)***Write more about common things people care about and less about politics.
** yes, if by "new accounting system" you mean, continue to throw receipts on to a pile called "ignore".
*** I did, into another rental...
2008
I didn't make any resolutions that I can find. I did write about 2008 being my Year of Hope though.
I did buy a house, finish my second book (and edits on the first), celebrate 3 years of marriage and my first year as a manager at work.
So I have tried a couple of different ways of resolving to resolve. I've made goals, I've set themes, I've NOT made goals. I can honestly say I do not know what works best for me. At the moment I can't see my way out of my little raincloud to decide what I want to do.
The skies will clear soon. I hope.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Feeling Blessed
I'm off to feed the hungry and hand out hampers at St. Mary's today. I am feeling especially blessed in my life. Even though God knows my shortcomings and sins, he still loves me. Today the pastor spoke about three things to remember this Christmas...
1) BE a Christian (don't just go to church but live a joyful, fulfilled, blessed Christian life),
2) Be extraordinary (don't hide your light),
3) Forgive (even yourself).
It may sound silly to say that I'm looking forward to feeding the hungry today, but I am, I'm hoping that I receive as much blessing as I can and I give as much blessing as I can.
1) BE a Christian (don't just go to church but live a joyful, fulfilled, blessed Christian life),
2) Be extraordinary (don't hide your light),
3) Forgive (even yourself).
It may sound silly to say that I'm looking forward to feeding the hungry today, but I am, I'm hoping that I receive as much blessing as I can and I give as much blessing as I can.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Feel the Fear and Write it Anyway...
Just found this post from the Word Strumpet and I found it very relevant. Especially this part:
Go on, read the rest...
I'm so used to the feeling of being nervous that I rarely even notice it anymore. Ratchet it up to terrified (say, book deal) and you'll get my attention, maybe. Meanwhile I go about my business being happily scared half out of my mind, doing it anyway: boarding the plane and hoping some kind gentleman will volunteer to lift my heavy laptop bag to the overhead compartment, meeting the new client, and opening up a new page to write on the computer or the spiral journal.I'm finally beginning to realize that if you're not scared, you're not living. If you're not putting your nerves on the line on a regular basis, it is time to dial it up a notch. This is true in garden variety living life, and its true in writing.
Fear is the flip side of creativity. But you can--and must--harness it. Maybe there's a creative person somewhere on the planet who doesn't experience fear, but I don't know where that someone is.
Go on, read the rest...
Twitter - Great Resource for Writers
I've run across some writers that don't know what Twitter is, or look down on it as a crazy time-wasting energy-suck. And surely it can be... you can even track how many hours you've spent on Twitter with Tweetwasters.
But for writers looking for sources, subjects or media/PR, there are very few other sites out there that can beat the instantaneous nature of Twitter.
Here are some Twitter people, aka Tweeps to follow, other than ME of course:
http://twitter.com/BreakingNewsOn
http://twitter.com/skydiver
http://twitter.com/prnewswire
http://twitter.com/CopyrightLaw
http://twitter.com/InternetLaw
http://twitter.com/BlogSquad
http://twitter.com/readersdigest
http://twitter.com/Reuters
http://twitter.com/ckrewson
http://twitter.com/msnbc
http://twitter.com/cnn
http://twitter.com/foxnews
I use an application called Twhirl that pops up the “tweets” every few seconds. Because I follow a lot of other writers and media types I tend to know where the great blog posts are and if something is relevant to my current writing, I can include it… plus I try to never forget to tweet my own blog posts and I get more comments and my site hits go up. I’ve noticed my ad revenue go up as well.
There are some netiquette rules to follow of course, just like any other online tool. You don't want to break them, but it's ok if you make a few mistakes... just get out there and try it!
But for writers looking for sources, subjects or media/PR, there are very few other sites out there that can beat the instantaneous nature of Twitter.
Here are some Twitter people, aka Tweeps to follow, other than ME of course:
http://twitter.com/BreakingNewsOn
http://twitter.com/skydiver
http://twitter.com/prnewswire
http://twitter.com/CopyrightLaw
http://twitter.com/InternetLaw
http://twitter.com/BlogSquad
http://twitter.com/readersdigest
http://twitter.com/Reuters
http://twitter.com/ckrewson
http://twitter.com/msnbc
http://twitter.com/cnn
http://twitter.com/foxnews
I use an application called Twhirl that pops up the “tweets” every few seconds. Because I follow a lot of other writers and media types I tend to know where the great blog posts are and if something is relevant to my current writing, I can include it… plus I try to never forget to tweet my own blog posts and I get more comments and my site hits go up. I’ve noticed my ad revenue go up as well.
There are some netiquette rules to follow of course, just like any other online tool. You don't want to break them, but it's ok if you make a few mistakes... just get out there and try it!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Ok, Off topic, but....
I laughed my stinkin' butt off at this video... George W. Bush can MOVE QUICK!
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Life is Good
Sorry peeps, didn't mean to make it sound all doom and gloom the other night. 1 am will do that to you. In the morning light, everything looks a bit brighter I think.
We had a snow storm yesterday, not the big horrible one they were predicting, but a good hefty dump of snow. Everyone acted shocked. Snow? What? And yet it's mid-December here in Canada and we'd been headed straight for a brown Christmas yet again. It might be kind of nice to have a Christmas with snow once again.
So remember we adopted two cats? Yeah, they are awesome. Every morning they are happy to see me, that's more than I can say for my kids who want to sleep in! ;0) But these two wind their way around my ankles, purring and meowing (or m-ow-ing as E would say). On mornings like this when I get to sit, ensconced on my couch, the big one tries to lay across my laptop. He succeeds in pinning down at least one arm and I almost don't want to make him move because he's warm and sweet.
The best thing at the moment is.... drumroll please.... my book is up on Amazon! (And Chapters in Canada!)
What do you think of the cover? I love it, love, love, love it! From what I understand, the cover illustrator entered in into the annual for the Society of Illustrators and was accepted.... now I don't know much about that but my publisher seemed really excited!
Unfortunately it won't be out in time for Christmas as it has a Spring release date, but I'm thoroughly excited to see it OUT THERE.
We had a snow storm yesterday, not the big horrible one they were predicting, but a good hefty dump of snow. Everyone acted shocked. Snow? What? And yet it's mid-December here in Canada and we'd been headed straight for a brown Christmas yet again. It might be kind of nice to have a Christmas with snow once again.
So remember we adopted two cats? Yeah, they are awesome. Every morning they are happy to see me, that's more than I can say for my kids who want to sleep in! ;0) But these two wind their way around my ankles, purring and meowing (or m-ow-ing as E would say). On mornings like this when I get to sit, ensconced on my couch, the big one tries to lay across my laptop. He succeeds in pinning down at least one arm and I almost don't want to make him move because he's warm and sweet.
The best thing at the moment is.... drumroll please.... my book is up on Amazon! (And Chapters in Canada!)
What do you think of the cover? I love it, love, love, love it! From what I understand, the cover illustrator entered in into the annual for the Society of Illustrators and was accepted.... now I don't know much about that but my publisher seemed really excited!
Unfortunately it won't be out in time for Christmas as it has a Spring release date, but I'm thoroughly excited to see it OUT THERE.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Late Nights
If there is one thing that defines me as a writing mother, it's the night. I don't mean anything ethereal about the night and the magic of it or anything, I mean, pfft... I mean most nights I sit here until far past midnight. Writing or editing or trying very hard not to procrastinate on Twitter or Facebook or LinkedIn or wherever else I can go to forget that Oh My Gosh Am Worst Writer Ever Why Do I Try.
(See, that never goes away.)
But here I sit, almost every night with the laptop and heavy socks and my feet up and a coffee or tea at my side. I usually make a list of what I need to get done and I keep working at it until my neck hurts or my eyes start to feel like they've been poked with hot coals.
And then when the alarm goes off at 0600, I try not to ignore it. Except today, apparently, I did. I'm supposed to be at work at 0730 and I looked over at the clock and it was 0708. Whoops. With Major Man working nights, he doesn't get off work until 0700 so I'm the one responsible for getting both kids up, ready and out the door. That's an hour minimum.
I admit that I wonder why I do this. I wonder if I can do this. But then I just put one foot in front of the other and one word next to another . . . and just one night after another.
(See, that never goes away.)
But here I sit, almost every night with the laptop and heavy socks and my feet up and a coffee or tea at my side. I usually make a list of what I need to get done and I keep working at it until my neck hurts or my eyes start to feel like they've been poked with hot coals.
And then when the alarm goes off at 0600, I try not to ignore it. Except today, apparently, I did. I'm supposed to be at work at 0730 and I looked over at the clock and it was 0708. Whoops. With Major Man working nights, he doesn't get off work until 0700 so I'm the one responsible for getting both kids up, ready and out the door. That's an hour minimum.
I admit that I wonder why I do this. I wonder if I can do this. But then I just put one foot in front of the other and one word next to another . . . and just one night after another.
Monday, December 01, 2008
Things That Are Old
When we moved into our house we snickered a bit at the old things that were in it. I mean, not the people, but the things. The wallpaper from the 70's, the original 1960's stove, oven and fridge. The minty green decoration in the bathroom.
They left us a few things: dressers, a bed, some artwork, wine glasses.
My most favourite leftover has been a radio that is quite likely older than I am. They left it on top of the fridge. At night when I am doing the evening dishes I turn it on and listen to the local Christian station. They have good sermons on. I know, I'm turning into my grandmother.
But that's the thing . . . it sounds *exactly* like grandma's radio. Which sat on the top of her fridge. And this radio works great! It's a heavy one, not like the cheap plastic ones you get now with the wimpy little antenna that never works. There isn't even a smidgen of static, just a strong signal.
It makes me think of the cliche, "they don't make things like they used to", which, of course, is only a cliche because of the truth of it. But that's the thing with this house - it is full of older appliances and fixtures that all work beautifully because someone has cared for them. When the stove broke after 20 years they didn't buy a new one - they fixed the old one! Imagine it! When something breaks I'm jumping up and down because wheeeee, I get to buy something new.
I'm turning over a new leaf - looking at my furniture, even the rag-tag, mix-match things I have, I am ok with keeping them around for a while longer.
Okie dokie, need to take a bit of a break from the typing tonight - the kitty is climbing all over my laptop, chasing my fingers. But he's so cute I might keep him around, too.
They left us a few things: dressers, a bed, some artwork, wine glasses.
My most favourite leftover has been a radio that is quite likely older than I am. They left it on top of the fridge. At night when I am doing the evening dishes I turn it on and listen to the local Christian station. They have good sermons on. I know, I'm turning into my grandmother.
But that's the thing . . . it sounds *exactly* like grandma's radio. Which sat on the top of her fridge. And this radio works great! It's a heavy one, not like the cheap plastic ones you get now with the wimpy little antenna that never works. There isn't even a smidgen of static, just a strong signal.
It makes me think of the cliche, "they don't make things like they used to", which, of course, is only a cliche because of the truth of it. But that's the thing with this house - it is full of older appliances and fixtures that all work beautifully because someone has cared for them. When the stove broke after 20 years they didn't buy a new one - they fixed the old one! Imagine it! When something breaks I'm jumping up and down because wheeeee, I get to buy something new.
I'm turning over a new leaf - looking at my furniture, even the rag-tag, mix-match things I have, I am ok with keeping them around for a while longer.
Okie dokie, need to take a bit of a break from the typing tonight - the kitty is climbing all over my laptop, chasing my fingers. But he's so cute I might keep him around, too.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Well now I'm reallly a writer...
... because I have the obligatory cats.
Two to be exact. Zorro, a three year old male and Ziggy, a three month old male. Both very cool individuals adopted from the Humane Society.
I'm so incredibly pleased with myself because the kids are loving on these cats and the cats (for the most part) are loving on them. Zorro is sleeping in Army Girl's bed and Ziggy with Army Boy. You wouldn't think that cats would voluntarily stay with a seven year old or a two year old. But they did. Both of them were purring like crazy and looking like bliss personified when I left them - the kids were still awake but content to sit and be happy with their new kitties.
Zorro, the older, fluffier cat is the ultimate writer's cat. He climbs up on my desk and curls himself around the mouse because he knows that's where my hand rests.
I've missed having animals in the house. I'm glad they are back.
Two to be exact. Zorro, a three year old male and Ziggy, a three month old male. Both very cool individuals adopted from the Humane Society.
I'm so incredibly pleased with myself because the kids are loving on these cats and the cats (for the most part) are loving on them. Zorro is sleeping in Army Girl's bed and Ziggy with Army Boy. You wouldn't think that cats would voluntarily stay with a seven year old or a two year old. But they did. Both of them were purring like crazy and looking like bliss personified when I left them - the kids were still awake but content to sit and be happy with their new kitties.
Zorro, the older, fluffier cat is the ultimate writer's cat. He climbs up on my desk and curls himself around the mouse because he knows that's where my hand rests.
I've missed having animals in the house. I'm glad they are back.
Friday, November 28, 2008
My Vices
I have a couple of vices. I admit it. I am not perfect. My family will die of shock right now. Fer shizzle.
One. Books, yeah this is no surprise. I have 700 or so books. The problem is that I haven't read them all. I buy them to HAVE them. It's wrong somehow - I know that. There are people in this world, probably kids in my own city that have no books and here I am, hoarding them. But reading a good book is something incredible. It's like if our life is one massive house, each book is a window or a door. I tend to look for God in every book I read, even when it's not overtly a Christian book.
Two. TV. Yes, I get caught up in all sorts of shows. House. Criminal Minds. Grey's Anatomy. ER. It's been going on for a long time, every since I had a crush on Mighty Mouse as a child. Then there was Little House on a Prairie, which was really the first show I felt I Could Not Do Without. Oh how I loved the story of Laura and Almanzo. It was the first romance I really felt I could believe in. Of course he was a stubborn man and Laura was headstrong, so it probably set the tone for my future lovelife. Nice. Thanks Laura Ingalls Wilder.
Thursday and Sunday nights have always been my night to watch TV. And yet now Mr. PVR has come into my life and everything has changed. I can save up all the shows I want until a night where I have finished all my work and the kids go to bed sweetly (or are at grandma's, like tonight) and I get to sleep in tomorrow. Now I can watch oodles of Criminal Minds and House and the movies I've saved. I love it!
How does this have to do with writing?
Like any vice, the call of it can be almost overwhelming. I'm actually irritated when I'm missing one of my shows or I don't want to start a writing project because a SHOW IS ON IN FIVE MINUTES. Sometimes I just push back my project (aka procrastinate) or I try to do both at the same time (never effective).
But now? Now I can put my vice on hold! And it's like a carrot! Finish work and watch shows guilt-free!
Newest gadget for every writer: PVR. (I think it's called TiVo in the States.)
One. Books, yeah this is no surprise. I have 700 or so books. The problem is that I haven't read them all. I buy them to HAVE them. It's wrong somehow - I know that. There are people in this world, probably kids in my own city that have no books and here I am, hoarding them. But reading a good book is something incredible. It's like if our life is one massive house, each book is a window or a door. I tend to look for God in every book I read, even when it's not overtly a Christian book.
Two. TV. Yes, I get caught up in all sorts of shows. House. Criminal Minds. Grey's Anatomy. ER. It's been going on for a long time, every since I had a crush on Mighty Mouse as a child. Then there was Little House on a Prairie, which was really the first show I felt I Could Not Do Without. Oh how I loved the story of Laura and Almanzo. It was the first romance I really felt I could believe in. Of course he was a stubborn man and Laura was headstrong, so it probably set the tone for my future lovelife. Nice. Thanks Laura Ingalls Wilder.
Thursday and Sunday nights have always been my night to watch TV. And yet now Mr. PVR has come into my life and everything has changed. I can save up all the shows I want until a night where I have finished all my work and the kids go to bed sweetly (or are at grandma's, like tonight) and I get to sleep in tomorrow. Now I can watch oodles of Criminal Minds and House and the movies I've saved. I love it!
How does this have to do with writing?
Like any vice, the call of it can be almost overwhelming. I'm actually irritated when I'm missing one of my shows or I don't want to start a writing project because a SHOW IS ON IN FIVE MINUTES. Sometimes I just push back my project (aka procrastinate) or I try to do both at the same time (never effective).
But now? Now I can put my vice on hold! And it's like a carrot! Finish work and watch shows guilt-free!
Newest gadget for every writer: PVR. (I think it's called TiVo in the States.)
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Dealing with Loss
How do you deal with loss? Isn't that a question without an answer? I think so.
Last weekend we lost a friend.
At work today - and all week - so many people are sad. Some are angry that he's gone.
Some hardly knew him. Some knew him for over a decade. Some were in the inner circle. Some hung about the outer rim.
I posted his obituary to Facebook tonight, wondering as I did if those who were closer to him might get offended. All day we have been preparing for his visitation tonight and sometimes I felt so wrong planning who I was going to carpool with or who was going with whom - it felt like planning a social event. I wanted to make it stop. Make us not have to check in with each other (time? your car or mine? how do you get there?) in the same way we'd plan a party or a night out.
But I realized that everyone has their own way of dealing. Just read his guestbook. Some are private, and close their office doors and honour him the way they know how, by doing their jobs well. Some talk about it, make jokes and remember how much fun he inspired. Some are silent, not revealing their emotion at all.
I'm choosing to talk about him. I'm choosing to tell people who didn't know Jim Haigh that he was important and special. You didn't know him? You missed out, buddy.
You missed his laugh, that I hear so loud in my head that I think I could actually open my mouth and it would come out. You missed a passion for his job that was the fuel for a small, just $100 million, empire. You missed watching him talk about "the business" and get so excited that he'd rock forward on the balls of his feet like he was going to launch himself into the crowd. You missed him pacing at the back of the room during the National Sales meetings, listening intently. You missed the empty coffee pots he'd leave that would make you shake your fist and call down the hall "this is how I know you're in the building, Jim! Empty coffee pots!" You missed dimples. You missed inside jokes and goblets of wine. You missed vision. You missed a mentor. You missed a friend.
You missed Jim.
And so do I.
Last weekend we lost a friend.
At work today - and all week - so many people are sad. Some are angry that he's gone.
Some hardly knew him. Some knew him for over a decade. Some were in the inner circle. Some hung about the outer rim.
I posted his obituary to Facebook tonight, wondering as I did if those who were closer to him might get offended. All day we have been preparing for his visitation tonight and sometimes I felt so wrong planning who I was going to carpool with or who was going with whom - it felt like planning a social event. I wanted to make it stop. Make us not have to check in with each other (time? your car or mine? how do you get there?) in the same way we'd plan a party or a night out.
But I realized that everyone has their own way of dealing. Just read his guestbook. Some are private, and close their office doors and honour him the way they know how, by doing their jobs well. Some talk about it, make jokes and remember how much fun he inspired. Some are silent, not revealing their emotion at all.
I'm choosing to talk about him. I'm choosing to tell people who didn't know Jim Haigh that he was important and special. You didn't know him? You missed out, buddy.
You missed his laugh, that I hear so loud in my head that I think I could actually open my mouth and it would come out. You missed a passion for his job that was the fuel for a small, just $100 million, empire. You missed watching him talk about "the business" and get so excited that he'd rock forward on the balls of his feet like he was going to launch himself into the crowd. You missed him pacing at the back of the room during the National Sales meetings, listening intently. You missed the empty coffee pots he'd leave that would make you shake your fist and call down the hall "this is how I know you're in the building, Jim! Empty coffee pots!" You missed dimples. You missed inside jokes and goblets of wine. You missed vision. You missed a mentor. You missed a friend.
You missed Jim.
And so do I.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
The Power of Words
On Monday I learned:
People make choices we may never understand - we still love them.
When there is true pain it can block out everything.
We can never know when the words we say to someone may be the last time we speak.
Strong people may not be so.
Crying is never a sign of weakness.
A wish for what you might have said to make a difference can be turned into action: say what you mean today to those you love.
Some friends you choose, some choose you and sometimes you get lumped in and learn to love each other.
There is never any need to compare pain with one another.
Some people leave - but they never leave us.
~~
Words have always been my strength. I rely on them and they always come through for me. But this week I learned that the words I hold in will lose their power. It does no good to think thoughts about someone's well-being and not express them. We often fear that we'll be seen as inappropriate or nosey. We worry if things are our business. We through about the words "how are you?" without even an expectation of a real answer.
Words, whether written or spoken, matter. They matter almost as much as touch. Almost as much as a hug. God, I hope that you gave me this gift of words for a better purpose. I promise that I will no longer keep that gift inside. I've used words to make money, to put food on the table, for my own selfish desires.
But what about blessing others? What about glorifying God? What about changing lives . . . or even the possibility of changing lives? What about delivering comfort? What about lifting spirits? What about telling someone that they matter?
I will do better.
People make choices we may never understand - we still love them.
When there is true pain it can block out everything.
We can never know when the words we say to someone may be the last time we speak.
Strong people may not be so.
Crying is never a sign of weakness.
A wish for what you might have said to make a difference can be turned into action: say what you mean today to those you love.
Some friends you choose, some choose you and sometimes you get lumped in and learn to love each other.
There is never any need to compare pain with one another.
Some people leave - but they never leave us.
~~
Words have always been my strength. I rely on them and they always come through for me. But this week I learned that the words I hold in will lose their power. It does no good to think thoughts about someone's well-being and not express them. We often fear that we'll be seen as inappropriate or nosey. We worry if things are our business. We through about the words "how are you?" without even an expectation of a real answer.
Words, whether written or spoken, matter. They matter almost as much as touch. Almost as much as a hug. God, I hope that you gave me this gift of words for a better purpose. I promise that I will no longer keep that gift inside. I've used words to make money, to put food on the table, for my own selfish desires.
But what about blessing others? What about glorifying God? What about changing lives . . . or even the possibility of changing lives? What about delivering comfort? What about lifting spirits? What about telling someone that they matter?
I will do better.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Slackers-Not-So-Anonymous
There's a great group of writing mothers that you might of heard about: The Writing Mothers. Lately, the list has been quiet. Which I'm convinced is because *I* have been quiet, except that would be giving myself a few more powers than I have (the sum is currently zero in the power department). But a very good discussion was sparked today and it seems like there are a few others out there who are also feeling frustratingly quiet.
I recently finished book #2, which will be released before book #1, so technically it will be my first book. Anyhoo...
This book was much harder to write than the first one (book one, which will be book two) because it had more technical info in it. There were certain topics that I knew, but I didn't know them to the depth which I needed to know them. Ya follow? For example, we all know that too much CO2 being released into the air is bad, right? But can you explain (with humor, wit and clarity please!) how much is too much? How many ppm is really bad and how many ppm is super-duper bad? Why is methane worse than CO2 and what's the difference between the concentrations and potency in our atmosphere?
So there was learning involved. And did I mention it was about 85,000 words?
The sheer size of it terrified me. But I did it. I finished.
And immediately I felt like I didn't want to write again for a year. I wanted to be just a mother, hanging out with my kids in the evening instead of rushing to the computer after I'd put them to bed. I wanted to catch up on all the shows I'd PVR'd without feeling guilty. And why did I feel guilty? Because every moment I wasn't writing, I knew I should be. Every moment I was writing, I felt like I should be with my kids. Every moment at my Day Job I felt like I should be either writing or with my kids, knowing that whichever I would choose I'd still go back to feeling guilty about not doing the other one.
What kind of craziness is this that I am afflicted with?!
Since I finished the book and finished the edits, I haven't written much. I've hardly blogged, I hardly email. I had one column due (yesterday) and I finished that (yesterday). But still I have been feeling like much less of a writer than I am used to. Because each time I sat down at the computer, I felt a certain amount of panic at what I had to accomplish. You don't know how many blog posts I started and then deleted because I'd get a paragraph in and think "this is stupid".
I think part of it was going through the edit process. My editor for this last book was wonderful. There were a lot of great comments on the manuscript that helped me to see where I needed to fix it and where I could improve. But as wonderful as the edits were, there's still that niggling voice that says "look at all the mistakes you made!" and my inner perfectionist comes out to perch upon my shoulder and make insinuating eyebrows at me.
So I started to not really want to write, I started to avoid it. Sure, I had things I wanted to write, but I didn't HAVE to - like blog posts. I started to let that procrastination habit creep back in. Then something happened. My friend Karen passed away and a package that I'd made up for her was still sitting, unsent at my office. I had procrastinated my way into a place I'd never been before, I actually missed a deadline (absolutely no pun intended on that one, though it would probably have made Karen smile) that I couldn't recover from.
Part of me just wanted to NOT do anything. If I didn't commit to anything, I would have no deadlines to miss. I embraced my inner slacker. Don't try so you don't miss anything.
But guess what? That's not me. I'm a driven person. I like to DO things. I like to take on scary projects that find me over my head. I think that it might even be the way God created me - willing to take a step or two on faith rather than leaning on my own understanding (or rationale). Willing to say "sure, I can do that" when I'm not sure if I can or not.
So here I am, Heather Cook, a reformed slacker. It was a dark moment, a quick foray into the unknown world of slackerdom. But I'm back.
I recently finished book #2, which will be released before book #1, so technically it will be my first book. Anyhoo...
This book was much harder to write than the first one (book one, which will be book two) because it had more technical info in it. There were certain topics that I knew, but I didn't know them to the depth which I needed to know them. Ya follow? For example, we all know that too much CO2 being released into the air is bad, right? But can you explain (with humor, wit and clarity please!) how much is too much? How many ppm is really bad and how many ppm is super-duper bad? Why is methane worse than CO2 and what's the difference between the concentrations and potency in our atmosphere?
So there was learning involved. And did I mention it was about 85,000 words?
The sheer size of it terrified me. But I did it. I finished.
And immediately I felt like I didn't want to write again for a year. I wanted to be just a mother, hanging out with my kids in the evening instead of rushing to the computer after I'd put them to bed. I wanted to catch up on all the shows I'd PVR'd without feeling guilty. And why did I feel guilty? Because every moment I wasn't writing, I knew I should be. Every moment I was writing, I felt like I should be with my kids. Every moment at my Day Job I felt like I should be either writing or with my kids, knowing that whichever I would choose I'd still go back to feeling guilty about not doing the other one.
What kind of craziness is this that I am afflicted with?!
Since I finished the book and finished the edits, I haven't written much. I've hardly blogged, I hardly email. I had one column due (yesterday) and I finished that (yesterday). But still I have been feeling like much less of a writer than I am used to. Because each time I sat down at the computer, I felt a certain amount of panic at what I had to accomplish. You don't know how many blog posts I started and then deleted because I'd get a paragraph in and think "this is stupid".
I think part of it was going through the edit process. My editor for this last book was wonderful. There were a lot of great comments on the manuscript that helped me to see where I needed to fix it and where I could improve. But as wonderful as the edits were, there's still that niggling voice that says "look at all the mistakes you made!" and my inner perfectionist comes out to perch upon my shoulder and make insinuating eyebrows at me.
So I started to not really want to write, I started to avoid it. Sure, I had things I wanted to write, but I didn't HAVE to - like blog posts. I started to let that procrastination habit creep back in. Then something happened. My friend Karen passed away and a package that I'd made up for her was still sitting, unsent at my office. I had procrastinated my way into a place I'd never been before, I actually missed a deadline (absolutely no pun intended on that one, though it would probably have made Karen smile) that I couldn't recover from.
Part of me just wanted to NOT do anything. If I didn't commit to anything, I would have no deadlines to miss. I embraced my inner slacker. Don't try so you don't miss anything.
But guess what? That's not me. I'm a driven person. I like to DO things. I like to take on scary projects that find me over my head. I think that it might even be the way God created me - willing to take a step or two on faith rather than leaning on my own understanding (or rationale). Willing to say "sure, I can do that" when I'm not sure if I can or not.
So here I am, Heather Cook, a reformed slacker. It was a dark moment, a quick foray into the unknown world of slackerdom. But I'm back.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Finding my way back
I don't know how we writers continue to do this. Some days I look wistfully across the playground at another mother and think "what's it like to have just one job?" Then I smack myself for being so judgmental because who the heck knows what another mother has on the back burner.
But having completed two manuscripts now, I'm learning for the second time that there's this weird, foggy, grey period after a manuscript is finished. I'm tired, so tired. (There was also the moving and now the unpacking.) But I've yet to go to bed before 11 pm because - get this - I feel guilty if I go to bed early because there's still much work to be done. Then I drag myself off to work in the morning. I work at 7:30 am, and I live really close to work, so some days (like the days when hubby is taking the kids to their respective drop-offs) I actually don't get in the shower until 7, and then I'm at work right on time. I just can't seem to get out of bed. Uh, gee, wonder why.
But slowly I'm finding my way back to writing again. I'm jealous of those that are writing right now, free and loose, able to find all the words they want. Me? I'm feeling, not stuck, just bored and tired at the same time.
Words aren't coming easily. I write at work, I type many emails during the day. But I'm not a "writer" at work. So many mornings I sit down to work and think "oh I could blog right now". But I like my job and want to keep it... and so writing while at work is out.
In short, sorry I've been away... I'm coming back now. I'm finding my way back to the safe spot where I can write and be happy. Because if a writing mother isn't happy, no body's happy.
But having completed two manuscripts now, I'm learning for the second time that there's this weird, foggy, grey period after a manuscript is finished. I'm tired, so tired. (There was also the moving and now the unpacking.) But I've yet to go to bed before 11 pm because - get this - I feel guilty if I go to bed early because there's still much work to be done. Then I drag myself off to work in the morning. I work at 7:30 am, and I live really close to work, so some days (like the days when hubby is taking the kids to their respective drop-offs) I actually don't get in the shower until 7, and then I'm at work right on time. I just can't seem to get out of bed. Uh, gee, wonder why.
But slowly I'm finding my way back to writing again. I'm jealous of those that are writing right now, free and loose, able to find all the words they want. Me? I'm feeling, not stuck, just bored and tired at the same time.
Words aren't coming easily. I write at work, I type many emails during the day. But I'm not a "writer" at work. So many mornings I sit down to work and think "oh I could blog right now". But I like my job and want to keep it... and so writing while at work is out.
In short, sorry I've been away... I'm coming back now. I'm finding my way back to the safe spot where I can write and be happy. Because if a writing mother isn't happy, no body's happy.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
This is a writing blog, really!
Not so much with the writing around here these days. Pictures, sometimes. Writing? Yeah, not so much.
Do you know what I've discovered? I've discovered that writing and editing are hard to do at the same time. It's hard to switch hats. In fact, I have to physically switch locations just to write this post. All night I've been editing. All weekend I've been editing. I've been to Starbucks and McDonalds and now (surprisingly) I know why I'm getting so fat.
Eat. Edit. Eat. Edit. Latte. Edit. Cheeseburger. Edit. Chocolate Chip Cookie made by hubby. Edit.
But please, please stay with me. The book is due on the 16th. I should be sane shortly after that. I'm moving on the 18th and then, well, then I will feel totally renewed with a new office space, a new room to sleep in. Maybe even a new bed.
But for now, I edit. I ignore the packing, I stumble around the boxes littering the living space. I ignore the carpet that required vaccuming and I just edit. And, apparently, eat.
Coming soon: weightwatchers meetings. Yes, really.
Do you know what I've discovered? I've discovered that writing and editing are hard to do at the same time. It's hard to switch hats. In fact, I have to physically switch locations just to write this post. All night I've been editing. All weekend I've been editing. I've been to Starbucks and McDonalds and now (surprisingly) I know why I'm getting so fat.
Eat. Edit. Eat. Edit. Latte. Edit. Cheeseburger. Edit. Chocolate Chip Cookie made by hubby. Edit.
But please, please stay with me. The book is due on the 16th. I should be sane shortly after that. I'm moving on the 18th and then, well, then I will feel totally renewed with a new office space, a new room to sleep in. Maybe even a new bed.
But for now, I edit. I ignore the packing, I stumble around the boxes littering the living space. I ignore the carpet that required vaccuming and I just edit. And, apparently, eat.
Coming soon: weightwatchers meetings. Yes, really.
Sunday, October 05, 2008
365 Photography Project - Day 5
October 5/08
Picture 5
I know I should take it away from her. We have one last bottle of the disposable inserts and I can't NOT use them. The only thing worse than using disposable inserts would be to buy them and not use them and THEN throw them out. After E hurt her tooth a week and a half ago, the dentist said that it would actually be good for her tooth if she drank from a bottle because it would keep it forward, not the smashed backwards position it was in after her epic fail with the floor. But I'm not a bottle fan. No, I'm a boob fan. I just went on a work trip at the wrong time and weaned her. :(
I know I should take it away from her. We have one last bottle of the disposable inserts and I can't NOT use them. The only thing worse than using disposable inserts would be to buy them and not use them and THEN throw them out. After E hurt her tooth a week and a half ago, the dentist said that it would actually be good for her tooth if she drank from a bottle because it would keep it forward, not the smashed backwards position it was in after her epic fail with the floor. But I'm not a bottle fan. No, I'm a boob fan. I just went on a work trip at the wrong time and weaned her. :(
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Friday, October 03, 2008
365 Photography Project - Day 3
October 3/08
Picture 3
This is my city. Part country. Part civilized.
Wouldn't have it any other way.
When I moved here, this whole picture would have been fields.
But now it's a mix.
City/Country
This is my city. Part country. Part civilized.Wouldn't have it any other way.
When I moved here, this whole picture would have been fields.
But now it's a mix.
City/Country
Thursday, October 02, 2008
365 Photography Project - Day 2
October 2/08
Picture 2
Picture 2
This is my son. Army Boy. He's high up in a tree, high enough that I had to get the zoom lens out to take the picture. Well, not the BIG zoom lens, but the medium one. :) He's always been what I call "risk averse" ... which sort of makes him sound like an investor. But he's cautious. The thing is, he is only cautious until he is confident he can step out and DO. This is the way he learned to read, actually. Little baby steps, unsure, cautious... and now he's reading like crazy. Last night I caught him reading in his room with his little light on. Warms a writing mother's heart.
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
365 Photography Project - Day 1
Carolyn Erickson pointed me towards Project 365 at Blissfully Domestic. I love this idea. I've seen it done before and have always thought it might be neat. So I'm going to post a picture each day. For a full year.
October 1/08
Picture 1.
This is a provincial park located within the city limits of Calgary. It's called Fish Creek Park and every year the Beavers (like Junior Scouts) go out on a hike. The evening's hike presented us with some beautiful weather. The kids - all 15 of them - make quite a racket as they race ahead and duck into bushes. I make an equal racket trying to corral them. Finally a more experienced leader pulled them aside and explained how there might be bears around the corner and if they ran ahead and ran into a bear, the bear might eat them before we caught up. Technically, there are no bears in this park. But they bought it. I see nothing wrong with this little white lie. :)
This is a provincial park located within the city limits of Calgary. It's called Fish Creek Park and every year the Beavers (like Junior Scouts) go out on a hike. The evening's hike presented us with some beautiful weather. The kids - all 15 of them - make quite a racket as they race ahead and duck into bushes. I make an equal racket trying to corral them. Finally a more experienced leader pulled them aside and explained how there might be bears around the corner and if they ran ahead and ran into a bear, the bear might eat them before we caught up. Technically, there are no bears in this park. But they bought it. I see nothing wrong with this little white lie. :)Saturday, September 27, 2008
Edits!
You know . . . when I'm writing I swear I like editing better.
When I'm editing I swear I like writing better.
Let's face it, I'm a grass is greener writer.
When I'm editing I swear I like writing better.
Let's face it, I'm a grass is greener writer.
I think I figured it out...
I think I figured out what bothers me so much about American politics.
On one hand they focus far too much on what a candidate looks and sounds like (rather than what they say).
On the other, they take it all SO seriously. Like a hairdo or a 15 second video of a stammer is going to decide how they vote.
So much energy is spent talking about the person's personal life or the pins they put on a lapel or what small errant slip of the tongue might indicate. They expect total and complete perfection in every word.
Mispronunciation? Oh, obviously that means he/she is an idiot. Forgot your flag pin? Oh you are anti-American. Stammer? Total idiot.
Whatever would they make of our candidates? PMs whose native language isn't English, heavy accents, facial paralysis... I mean I was never a fan of ol Jean, but you wouldn't catch me judging him on what he looks or sounds like. We could even forgive some of the dumbest sounding statements because we know that people aren't always perfect and don't always speak in perfect evening news soundbites.
It's almost as though they insist that their candidates be media savvy OVER being a person of action. Almost like they believe it's what you SAY and how you say it, not what you DO.
I've never realized how spoiled we are up here in Canada to have voters that can look past the first layer, past the news soundbite, past the mispronunciations and unpolished interviews. We're much more forgiving.
And, obviously, to my American friends and readers... I realize that not everyone is like this, but these days I can't seem to read as many blogs as I once did without tripping over the same Palin video clips accompanied by the nearly identical commentary about what she sounds like or if she stammers or if she looks nervous.
(Oh, and anyone who says that living next door to Russia doesn't give you any foreign policy experience . . . has never lived right next door to a large and powerful foreign country. Most Americans wouldn't consider Canada that powerful, I get that you don't give us a second thought. But Canadians? We know how our lives are affected by America . . . and our provincial leaders have trade experience and more because they share a border with America.)
(I'm tired of hearing that Obama only says "Change!" The people who use that as some kind of dig have not gone far enough to actually look up what he DOES say. Do your research, he gets a tad more specific. LOL)
Ok, now hopefully I haven't offended the pants off of everyone. I'll try not to be so CANADIAN and say SORRY.
On one hand they focus far too much on what a candidate looks and sounds like (rather than what they say).
On the other, they take it all SO seriously. Like a hairdo or a 15 second video of a stammer is going to decide how they vote.
So much energy is spent talking about the person's personal life or the pins they put on a lapel or what small errant slip of the tongue might indicate. They expect total and complete perfection in every word.
Mispronunciation? Oh, obviously that means he/she is an idiot. Forgot your flag pin? Oh you are anti-American. Stammer? Total idiot.
Whatever would they make of our candidates? PMs whose native language isn't English, heavy accents, facial paralysis... I mean I was never a fan of ol Jean, but you wouldn't catch me judging him on what he looks or sounds like. We could even forgive some of the dumbest sounding statements because we know that people aren't always perfect and don't always speak in perfect evening news soundbites.
It's almost as though they insist that their candidates be media savvy OVER being a person of action. Almost like they believe it's what you SAY and how you say it, not what you DO.
I've never realized how spoiled we are up here in Canada to have voters that can look past the first layer, past the news soundbite, past the mispronunciations and unpolished interviews. We're much more forgiving.
And, obviously, to my American friends and readers... I realize that not everyone is like this, but these days I can't seem to read as many blogs as I once did without tripping over the same Palin video clips accompanied by the nearly identical commentary about what she sounds like or if she stammers or if she looks nervous.
(Oh, and anyone who says that living next door to Russia doesn't give you any foreign policy experience . . . has never lived right next door to a large and powerful foreign country. Most Americans wouldn't consider Canada that powerful, I get that you don't give us a second thought. But Canadians? We know how our lives are affected by America . . . and our provincial leaders have trade experience and more because they share a border with America.)
(I'm tired of hearing that Obama only says "Change!" The people who use that as some kind of dig have not gone far enough to actually look up what he DOES say. Do your research, he gets a tad more specific. LOL)
Ok, now hopefully I haven't offended the pants off of everyone. I'll try not to be so CANADIAN and say SORRY.
Libel Insurance: The Non-Product
So I'm phoning around for house insurance quotes.
I was surprised to hear that the last insurance company offered me "Libel" insurance on my home insurance. To understand the libel issue, you really have to be Canadian. For Americans you have your "freedom of speech". In Canada, the onus is on the WRITER to prove that what they wrote is true. This means you can be sued by anyone for something you wrote, even if it was completely true. If they don't like you and want to shut you up, well, they just have to sue you and put you tens of thousands of dollars in debt, you lose your home and are destitute and suddenly you don't want to write anything risque any more.
Truth is a defense, yes, but it won't stop you from being sued and spending thousands upon thousands in legal fees. So I was kind of hoping that this libel insurance thing was the real deal. But here was the very frustrating conversation:
Her: We offer libel insurance for $200 a year.
Me: Oh yeah? Even if I'm a writer and I write books?
Her: Yes.
Me: That's very interesting, I'm a member of the Professional Writers Association of Canada and libel is a topic that comes up quite often. See, there's this thing called libel chill where freelancers don't write hardcore journalism as much because they are worried they'll be sued for libel.
Her: Um, can you hold?
Me: Sure.
I'm thinking, crap, why did I tell her that? Why did I admit it? I could have GOTTEN libel insurance. Oh, wait, because it would have been dishonest and they probably would have denied any claim anyway.
Her: Hi, um, so we can't offer that insurance because you publish your writing.
Me: But, it's LIBEL insurance. How would someone know I wrote something to sue me about if I didn't publish it?
Her: Well, if you say something and someone sues you -
Me: - no, spoken is slander, libel is written. Do you offer slander insurance then?
Her: Well, um, no, see, libel insurance is for if someone sues you over something you write. But you publish what you write.
Me: Right. Because for them to read what I write, I'd have to put it "out there", so I'd have to "publish it". How else would they read what I wrote? If you write something on a piece of paper and put it in your pocket, it's not published. But if you put it where someone can read it, like, say, on a blog or in a magazine or in a book . . . then legally it's published.
Her: Right, but you get paid.
Me: That doesn't matter, publishing is publishing regardless of whether or not the writer is paid.
Her: But, we can't offer libel insurance on anything you publish.
Me: Ok, so your libel insurance covers my diary and the notes I write and stick in my pocket.
Her: But if you say -
Me: - that's spoken, it's slander.
The poor girl, I felt a little bad for her at the end. Selling a non-product and not knowing what that non-product even is...
I was surprised to hear that the last insurance company offered me "Libel" insurance on my home insurance. To understand the libel issue, you really have to be Canadian. For Americans you have your "freedom of speech". In Canada, the onus is on the WRITER to prove that what they wrote is true. This means you can be sued by anyone for something you wrote, even if it was completely true. If they don't like you and want to shut you up, well, they just have to sue you and put you tens of thousands of dollars in debt, you lose your home and are destitute and suddenly you don't want to write anything risque any more.
Truth is a defense, yes, but it won't stop you from being sued and spending thousands upon thousands in legal fees. So I was kind of hoping that this libel insurance thing was the real deal. But here was the very frustrating conversation:
Her: We offer libel insurance for $200 a year.
Me: Oh yeah? Even if I'm a writer and I write books?
Her: Yes.
Me: That's very interesting, I'm a member of the Professional Writers Association of Canada and libel is a topic that comes up quite often. See, there's this thing called libel chill where freelancers don't write hardcore journalism as much because they are worried they'll be sued for libel.
Her: Um, can you hold?
Me: Sure.
I'm thinking, crap, why did I tell her that? Why did I admit it? I could have GOTTEN libel insurance. Oh, wait, because it would have been dishonest and they probably would have denied any claim anyway.
Her: Hi, um, so we can't offer that insurance because you publish your writing.
Me: But, it's LIBEL insurance. How would someone know I wrote something to sue me about if I didn't publish it?
Her: Well, if you say something and someone sues you -
Me: - no, spoken is slander, libel is written. Do you offer slander insurance then?
Her: Well, um, no, see, libel insurance is for if someone sues you over something you write. But you publish what you write.
Me: Right. Because for them to read what I write, I'd have to put it "out there", so I'd have to "publish it". How else would they read what I wrote? If you write something on a piece of paper and put it in your pocket, it's not published. But if you put it where someone can read it, like, say, on a blog or in a magazine or in a book . . . then legally it's published.
Her: Right, but you get paid.
Me: That doesn't matter, publishing is publishing regardless of whether or not the writer is paid.
Her: But, we can't offer libel insurance on anything you publish.
Me: Ok, so your libel insurance covers my diary and the notes I write and stick in my pocket.
Her: But if you say -
Me: - that's spoken, it's slander.
The poor girl, I felt a little bad for her at the end. Selling a non-product and not knowing what that non-product even is...
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Offices
As we start to get ready to move, I start thinking about my new "office". Originally I was hoping that I'd get an actual office ROOM. Like, with a DOOR. But I realized quickly that every home we looked at with that all important potential office . . . just didn't work. The room was always too far away from wherever the kids were going to play.
So, for a few more years, I'll be working away in an area just off the playroom. In our new house it will be in the basement, in the "bar" area. The kids will have a larger, longer area. If the area were shaped like a capital L, then my office is in the horizontal part, the kids play area is in the vertical.
I was searching around for great home office areas and found one site that had pictures of "famous" home offices. Except it also had lots of PRON sites as advertisers. So. Not linking there!
But HGTV seems to have some great ideas. But what I really found interesting was a search on Flickr for home offices. I almost can't make up my mind, but I have many years in this house to decide on the perfect office. I think the walls will be blue. That's as far as I've gotten.
So, for a few more years, I'll be working away in an area just off the playroom. In our new house it will be in the basement, in the "bar" area. The kids will have a larger, longer area. If the area were shaped like a capital L, then my office is in the horizontal part, the kids play area is in the vertical.
I was searching around for great home office areas and found one site that had pictures of "famous" home offices. Except it also had lots of PRON sites as advertisers. So. Not linking there!
But HGTV seems to have some great ideas. But what I really found interesting was a search on Flickr for home offices. I almost can't make up my mind, but I have many years in this house to decide on the perfect office. I think the walls will be blue. That's as far as I've gotten.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Octopus Moms
I was recently interviewed by Lisa Bendall, a fellow PWAC member about being an Octopus Mom. Lisa is also one of the many multi-tasking moms you come across these days. She was interviewed about her life as well.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
SOLD PICS!
I love the trees - they give us such privacy, not to mention they'll keep the house cooler in the summer! It looks like I've have gardens to keep up and everything. I love it!!!
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Buying a House? Don't forget the Valium.
In the grand scheme of things, with all that is going on in the world, there is little need for more drama. As I write this there are stories playing out on TV of horrible things that have happened: floods, deaths, war, loss. But please bear with me for a moment while I tell you a little story about buying a house.
Do you remember the post about buying a house?
Well. We KNEW it would inspect well. We KNEW it. And sure enough, the inspector kept saying "wow" and "they wrote the book on pride of ownership" and "this is a GOOD house". He was happy to be teaching me these little tidbits about a good house with a good example in front of him. Normally he'd be showing someone a problem and saying "now it should look like . . . "
Now, we'd been pre-approved for about $40K more than the accepted offer, so we figured we were golden, right?
Um, wrong. See, we were doing the "zero down" thing that they are taking away as of October 15th. We were fitting in under the wire. Except that last week was probably the worst week in the last five years to try and get a mortgage. The US was imploding; stock markets were roller coasters; companies were being bailed out by governments. We could NOT have timed it worse.
The lender decided that they wanted an appraisal done to make sure that what we were paying for the house was what the house was worth. That way if we default on the mortgage the day after we sign, they can turn around and sell it. This makes NO sense to me because it's the buyer and the buying market that determines the worth and value of a house. The answer to "what's it worth" is always "what someone will pay". The bank doesn't factor in "one block from Army Boy's school" or "across the street from where soccer is held each spring". No, they look at theoretically more concrete things. (What they are, I don't know..)
It wasn't enough that the city's tax assessment put the house's value at almost $100K more than what we paid (I'm going to have a chat with the city tax department about this one, let me tell you) because that has more to do with what it will cost the city to maintain your street/community/alley etc...
There were miscommunications with the appraisers, they had to come back to appraise it (I think they only did a 'drive by' the first time) and they promised a 24 hour turnaround on the report when it took much longer than that... I feel bad that the realtors and the mortgage broker had to do so much work - whatever kind of commission they get, they earned every single penny just having to deal with me. I'm not patient. Factor in that I was sick (fever, ear infection, headache...) and you have a very cranky client.
We were told that yes, we'd been approved for the dollars, just not necessarily on THAT HOUSE. Because the appraisal came by under the purchase price, suddenly the bank didn't want to insure that mortgage. Or, um, the insurer didn't want to insure it and so the bank wouldn't lend it. Something like that. We were qualified to buy, just not any house. The bank wanted their say. In other words, pre-approval means sweet tweet.
The mortgage broker (who I'm sure had better things to do on a Friday night) spent hours on the phone with managers from BC to ON trying to find out how much the silly property had appraised at. Were we talking a difference of $500, $5000 or what?
Finally we heard that it appraised at $5K under the purchase price. Ah, for the wont of $5000. We found the extra $5000 and I signed the paper at 7:55 pm. Just an hour and five minutes before the 9 pm deadline.
And about three hours after I'd lost my mind. I was literally sitting in a chair, staring at the roof and almost not caring which direction this deal would go as long as it would be over soon. Actually, now that I think about it, that reminds me a lot of childbirth. "I can't do this any more, make it stop, make it go away, get it out."
If you are in Calgary and need a home buying team, please let me recommend Kari & Mark Ashlee as well as Debbie Weiss with ProLink Mortgage. Bar none, the best team you ever want to have.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
I Heart Words
I know, some people are driven BATTY by the phrase "I heart..." but I kind of like it. I like playing with words, making them mine and using them the way I want to. I even like breaking some grammar rules as long as I know I'm breaking them. Because it's horrendous to break them accidentally.
But I love finding words. I subscribe to several "word of the day" newsletters and my current favourite word is cicumlocution. It's the BEST word for the coming political races, isn't it?
Meaning
*1 : the use of an unnecessarily large number of words to express an idea
2 : evasion in speech
Example Sentence
*Mr. Harvey was notorious for his tendency to engage in endless circumlocution when a simple, brief explanation would suffice.
But I love finding words. I subscribe to several "word of the day" newsletters and my current favourite word is cicumlocution. It's the BEST word for the coming political races, isn't it?
Meaning
*1 : the use of an unnecessarily large number of words to express an idea
2 : evasion in speech
Example Sentence
*Mr. Harvey was notorious for his tendency to engage in endless circumlocution when a simple, brief explanation would suffice.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
A Happy End to House Hunting
Just a little over a week ago Major Man and I decided to see if we could get approved for a mortgage. We're in Canada (as many of you may know) so the rules are a little different than in the US. We're not facing a mortgage crisis of any magnitude though the market is softening considerably.
We discovered that the Government was putting some rule changes into effect on Oct 15th. Taking away the 40 year amoritization and the "no money down" option, though you can still withdraw from your RRSP to put money down on a home and you have 15 years to pay that money back. Easily done when you contribute regularly.
The government wants to avoid what is happening in the US so I'm glad that they are making these changes. It would mean that we'd be years away from owning a home though. Since Major Man was finally in a good job and I have a long term job, we figured we'd give pre-qualification a shot. We were more than mildly surprised to learn that we qualified for a decent mortgage. This was last Thursday, the 4th.
We about 20 homes in one week and yesterday we signed the paperwork to buy one! Boy, that was quick! We looked at it twice, first it was just me, then I brought my husband. The couple who owns it now has lived there for 42 years. It is in pristine condition. The deal currently hinges on the home inspection, but I can almost guarantee that there will be no surprises there. The house was immaculate. One of the coolest things was that this couple bought everything brand new in the 60s and they did NOT replace anything. They fixed and maintained. Everything is original except the white carpet in the front that covers the original hardwood.
Have a little look-see:
The light is pretty good in the master bedroom.
Inside the closet was a 75 pound turquoise green vacuum cleaner.
The backyard was beautifully maintained.
Gas firepit!
There's also a fenced off garden.
There are many bunnies in the neighbourhood, so I'm glad there's a fence.
Note that the cooktop, fridge and oven (which you can't see here) are ORIGINAL.
There are buttons on the cooktop to turn on the burners.
The inside of the fridge? Turquoise green of course!
With an "icebox"!
Do you see how shiny that floor is??
This will be a reading area.
The kids can eat in the kitchen.
No eating on the white carpet.
Punishment: disem-Nintendo-ment.
They've offered (and we TOTALLY ACCEPTED) to let us keep their floral couch and chair.
What keeps sticking out in my mind is that for so long I thought that home ownership was a fantasy, I'd never own a home. If anyone is fighting their way through debt, divorce, single-parenthood and feeling stressed, let me tell you: IT GETS BETTER. You can do it!
I feel incredibly lucky to be moving in to this home that has nurtured a family for 42 years. The couple who we bought it from had cards from their recent 50th anniversary proudly displayed. Did you hear that honey? Only 47 more years for us.
And the best part? If you look at this picture, you can see how close the house is to TWO schools. Army Boy attends the elementary on the right, while the junior high school is on the left. In the bottom left hand corner is the community centre. This big field is also where we play soccer every summer! Location! Location! Location!
Now, to start the packing . . .
We discovered that the Government was putting some rule changes into effect on Oct 15th. Taking away the 40 year amoritization and the "no money down" option, though you can still withdraw from your RRSP to put money down on a home and you have 15 years to pay that money back. Easily done when you contribute regularly.
The government wants to avoid what is happening in the US so I'm glad that they are making these changes. It would mean that we'd be years away from owning a home though. Since Major Man was finally in a good job and I have a long term job, we figured we'd give pre-qualification a shot. We were more than mildly surprised to learn that we qualified for a decent mortgage. This was last Thursday, the 4th.
We about 20 homes in one week and yesterday we signed the paperwork to buy one! Boy, that was quick! We looked at it twice, first it was just me, then I brought my husband. The couple who owns it now has lived there for 42 years. It is in pristine condition. The deal currently hinges on the home inspection, but I can almost guarantee that there will be no surprises there. The house was immaculate. One of the coolest things was that this couple bought everything brand new in the 60s and they did NOT replace anything. They fixed and maintained. Everything is original except the white carpet in the front that covers the original hardwood.
Have a little look-see:
Just walking up, you can see that it's got a nice front yard, very clean.
There's a carport, no garage.
We really don't need a garage, neither of us 'tinker' in there!
There's a carport, no garage.
We really don't need a garage, neither of us 'tinker' in there!
The bathroom is awesome in green, lol.
But look! Dual sinks!
But look! Dual sinks!
The light is pretty good in the master bedroom.
Inside the closet was a 75 pound turquoise green vacuum cleaner.
This room nearly did me in.
Look at the retro walls!
The bar! Glass on the wall!
ORANGE!
The fireplace is a fake electric one. Love it.
(But, uh, those walls are getting painted!)
Look at the retro walls!
The bar! Glass on the wall!
ORANGE!
The fireplace is a fake electric one. Love it.
(But, uh, those walls are getting painted!)
The backyard was beautifully maintained.
Gas firepit!
There's also a fenced off garden.
There are many bunnies in the neighbourhood, so I'm glad there's a fence.
Note that the cooktop, fridge and oven (which you can't see here) are ORIGINAL.
There are buttons on the cooktop to turn on the burners.
The inside of the fridge? Turquoise green of course!
With an "icebox"!
Do you see how shiny that floor is??
This will be a reading area.
The kids can eat in the kitchen.
No eating on the white carpet.
Punishment: disem-Nintendo-ment.
They've offered (and we TOTALLY ACCEPTED) to let us keep their floral couch and chair.
What keeps sticking out in my mind is that for so long I thought that home ownership was a fantasy, I'd never own a home. If anyone is fighting their way through debt, divorce, single-parenthood and feeling stressed, let me tell you: IT GETS BETTER. You can do it!
I feel incredibly lucky to be moving in to this home that has nurtured a family for 42 years. The couple who we bought it from had cards from their recent 50th anniversary proudly displayed. Did you hear that honey? Only 47 more years for us.
And the best part? If you look at this picture, you can see how close the house is to TWO schools. Army Boy attends the elementary on the right, while the junior high school is on the left. In the bottom left hand corner is the community centre. This big field is also where we play soccer every summer! Location! Location! Location!
Now, to start the packing . . .
Sunday, August 31, 2008
A Newborn and a Notebook
Check out this awesome handout from Writing Mother extraordinaire Ann Douglas.
What does being a writing mother look like to you?
Hello Writing Mothers! I always wonder how other writing mothers actually write . . . what does it look like while they write. So here's a look at what it looks like when I write.
My daughter must be with me, she's a funny child. When she wants to be by herself, Do Not Touch Her. When she wants to be with me, Do Not Put Me Down! Thankfully, like the bell curve, she's only at the extreme once in a while.
But her new favorite place to be is on my desk. She's got a little spot on a two drawer file cabinet (to the left of where she's sitting in the pic), but she often migrates over to the desktop. Unfortunately she's clued into the fact that I can look at her and have a conversation and still keep typing. Sometimes she reaches over to pull my hands away from the keyboard.
What does being a writing mother look like to you?
Call for Submissions: Women and Horses
Well this one is sure near and dear to my heart!
Christina Katz sent out a note about submissions for an upcoming anthology about Women and Horses. If you've ever fallen in love with a horse, you might have a story to submit.
Christina Katz sent out a note about submissions for an upcoming anthology about Women and Horses. If you've ever fallen in love with a horse, you might have a story to submit.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
The Story of a Sign
Not only will this make your eyes leak, but it says something wonderful about the power of words.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
What do you listen to while writing?
I really haven't found one thing to listen to... I know I do well in silence, but really, I might just as well say "I write well in an Austrian spa" because my chances are about the same for silence.
Very often I have the tv on in the background, I try to keep it on the country music channel. I used to have the TV on all day long and I developed this really weird belief that if I turned it off, I Was Going To Miss Something Important!! Nevermind that it was always the same political blah-blah and pop-star-shaves-something crapola that it always is.
With my first book I wrote half of it alone in my living room/office while the kids were with my mother and with the music cranked. I especially listened to Pink. I don't know why, but I was practically a democrat after listening to her for so long that I had to immerse myself in some Toby Keith to get "right" again.
Very often I have the tv on in the background, I try to keep it on the country music channel. I used to have the TV on all day long and I developed this really weird belief that if I turned it off, I Was Going To Miss Something Important!! Nevermind that it was always the same political blah-blah and pop-star-shaves-something crapola that it always is.
With my first book I wrote half of it alone in my living room/office while the kids were with my mother and with the music cranked. I especially listened to Pink. I don't know why, but I was practically a democrat after listening to her for so long that I had to immerse myself in some Toby Keith to get "right" again.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Mailbox! Mailbox!
When I try to post the video it posts v e r y w i d e so let's just try this link. It's worth it.
Though I didn't see Georgia there. But I still love Comic Sans!
Though I didn't see Georgia there. But I still love Comic Sans!
Saturday, August 16, 2008
What Do You Stand For?
Several weeks ago I responded to a query in Help A Reporter Out, looking for people to submit videos and pictures of why they are Standing Up To Cancer.
This is the result of that query. You'll see me briefly at 1:40. I'm holding a sign that says "for the next generation". This was for my friend Karen, who you can see below, holding my daughter at the 2006 NRHA Futurity. This picture was taken after she won her first battle against cancer. She's now fighting for a second time. My daughter turns two tomorrow and I want her to know Karen when she's twenty. So that's why I'm standing up to cancer.
Please go have a look at the StandUp2Cancer site. It's a wonderful project. Especially The Stand part.
And if you feel so inclined, please feel free to support me in the Run For The Cure in October.
This is the result of that query. You'll see me briefly at 1:40. I'm holding a sign that says "for the next generation". This was for my friend Karen, who you can see below, holding my daughter at the 2006 NRHA Futurity. This picture was taken after she won her first battle against cancer. She's now fighting for a second time. My daughter turns two tomorrow and I want her to know Karen when she's twenty. So that's why I'm standing up to cancer.
Please go have a look at the StandUp2Cancer site. It's a wonderful project. Especially The Stand part.And if you feel so inclined, please feel free to support me in the Run For The Cure in October.
RIP Madison
Madison was the first dog that I chose for myself and brought home. Sure, there'd been the little Fizzgig that my parents bought us when we were kids. But Madison was mine. She was a rescue. Tied up in a barn in Conrich, Alberta and awaiting a bullet because she couldn't work sheep. She was a border collie, though from the looks of her she might have something else mixed in there. She's not a typical "tri" coloured border collie.
But I hauled her home from that stall when I was 16 - and now I'm in my 30s. So we figure she was at least 16 or 17 years old. I named her Madison because that was the name I had in my head for my first daughter. I just couldn't wait long enough to save it for a girl. And once I did have Miss E, I couldn't name her Madison because we had Madison the Dog. Unlike my cousin, Jodie, who everyone knows was named after her father's horse, Jodie. :)
Lately all the parts weren't working any more. The front end was fine. The eyes were going, the hearing had long since departed. The back end couldn't support her to stand in one spot for more than a few seconds. It kind of moved sideways as she walked, her right leg seemed to lean into the left for support.
It took a long time to make the decision to put her down. She wasn't my dog any more, she'd been living with mom since 1996 when I moved to Europe. When I came home the next year I didn't bother to claim her back. So it wasn't my decision to put her down, but it was. I don't know if mom was waiting for my ok or not, but last week I said "Yeah mom, I think it's time" and this week they booked the appointment.
I wasn't there for it. I had to pick up my daughter. But these pictures were taken the same day. Mom commented that they made her look so healthy and happy. They do. But I've left out the pictures where she couldn't get up or she was splayed out trying to stand. Or where she sneezed as she walked and almost fell over.
It was hard to take these pictures, knowing they'd be the last I'd see of her. I would try to keep her in one spot, reaching out with my hand to steady her. But she couldn't see my hand until it was touching her nose, so it would often startle her.
M doesn't get it yet, why Madison isn't there any more. Well, that's not true. He understands that she's gone to heaven. But last night he stayed at Mom's and as he was going to bed he said, "First is a baby, then toddler, then kid, then teenager, and then adult. And after that is when you are put down?" So I see we have some more discussing to do.
But I hauled her home from that stall when I was 16 - and now I'm in my 30s. So we figure she was at least 16 or 17 years old. I named her Madison because that was the name I had in my head for my first daughter. I just couldn't wait long enough to save it for a girl. And once I did have Miss E, I couldn't name her Madison because we had Madison the Dog. Unlike my cousin, Jodie, who everyone knows was named after her father's horse, Jodie. :)
Lately all the parts weren't working any more. The front end was fine. The eyes were going, the hearing had long since departed. The back end couldn't support her to stand in one spot for more than a few seconds. It kind of moved sideways as she walked, her right leg seemed to lean into the left for support.
It took a long time to make the decision to put her down. She wasn't my dog any more, she'd been living with mom since 1996 when I moved to Europe. When I came home the next year I didn't bother to claim her back. So it wasn't my decision to put her down, but it was. I don't know if mom was waiting for my ok or not, but last week I said "Yeah mom, I think it's time" and this week they booked the appointment.
I wasn't there for it. I had to pick up my daughter. But these pictures were taken the same day. Mom commented that they made her look so healthy and happy. They do. But I've left out the pictures where she couldn't get up or she was splayed out trying to stand. Or where she sneezed as she walked and almost fell over.
It was hard to take these pictures, knowing they'd be the last I'd see of her. I would try to keep her in one spot, reaching out with my hand to steady her. But she couldn't see my hand until it was touching her nose, so it would often startle her.
M doesn't get it yet, why Madison isn't there any more. Well, that's not true. He understands that she's gone to heaven. But last night he stayed at Mom's and as he was going to bed he said, "First is a baby, then toddler, then kid, then teenager, and then adult. And after that is when you are put down?" So I see we have some more discussing to do.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Well thank goodness someone finally explained it to me...
I was married into a Scottish family and I could never get the terminology down pat about Great Britain, Britain, the UK... etc...
Now we have a diagram.
Now we have a diagram.
Friday, August 08, 2008
Woe is me... or, I, no... me ... oh what the heck, just WOE.
It's close to 11 pm and I'm up. With the flu. See, I've been sleeping ALL DAY. Sleeping that fitful sleep where you are hot then cold then sweating then not... and it was near record breaking temperatures today. When I was cold, I slept upstairs... when hot, I moved to the basement.
Which is where hubby found me when he came home to tell me that his truck was dead. Some electrical problem. And you know with those problems they could spend ten hours (at $100/hr) looking for the problem and not find it... so I think we're going to be a one car family. Surprisingly I'm not upset about this... now that he's working downtown he doesn't need a car, he can take transit downtown just fine.
But I will miss the little truck. It's a little Chevy S10, a two-seater that wasn't really that appropriate for our four-person family... but still, it was the last little bachelor hold-out for DH. :)
Which is where hubby found me when he came home to tell me that his truck was dead. Some electrical problem. And you know with those problems they could spend ten hours (at $100/hr) looking for the problem and not find it... so I think we're going to be a one car family. Surprisingly I'm not upset about this... now that he's working downtown he doesn't need a car, he can take transit downtown just fine.
But I will miss the little truck. It's a little Chevy S10, a two-seater that wasn't really that appropriate for our four-person family... but still, it was the last little bachelor hold-out for DH. :)
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
Me want! Me want!
Ok, if every I have the chance to build my own house, I am building myself these stairs. I know hubby would like me to move my "collection" somewhere else because the books be takin' over!
Monday, August 04, 2008
Parenting Award
If you look at this picture you will notice that I took my kids to Heritage Park... with a gun. That would be my beautiful daughter throwing a gun at her brother.
Note to self: check out what's stored in the Pikachu backpack before leaving the house.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Plastic Bags
Have a look at this slide show regarding plastic bag recycling. It's long, but worth it. We no longer use plastic bags and I love it... selfishly I have to say it works for our family because those cloth bags can hold so much more...
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